They say all good things must come to an end, and I suppose that’s true in some ways. Next month, a major chapter of my life will wind down to a close as I shut my laptop one last time, breathe a sigh of contentment, and bid my BlogHer co-workers a heartfelt goodbye. Or, I expect I will be breathing a sigh of contentment.

It could be a sigh of fear, or apprehension, or incredulousness at my own brazen actions. You see, I drank the BlogHer Kool-Aid back in 2006, when I first started working as a conference volunteer and attended my first BlogHer event. I worked every conference after that, coming on staff in 2008. When Elisa Camahort Page first called me to tell me that BlogHer was making my volunteer role into a full-time position with the company, and then asked if I was interested in that job, my heart stopped for a moment, my eyes lit up, and I mashed my lips together to suppress an ear-to-ear smile. Like someone had just told me I won the lottery, and I was afraid I was being Punk’d. The entire reason I kept volunteering is because I had so much FUN working with Elisa and with the hundreds of speakers we’ve had over the years. And now she was asking me if I wanted to have FUN full-time! I didn’t even have to think about what my reply would be. Of course! Yes! I was pretty sure the only way BlogHer would get rid of me was to fire me, because I’d never leave on my own.

And now I am.

I’m not moving anywhere professionally, unless you count Chief Homemaking Officer of our household. I expect I’ll be updating more often on this blog, Chirky.com, with a little of my extra time. I’m so thankful for this gift, this opportunity to fill my days by playing with and pouring into my daughter. I’m already gathering “tot school” materials for a little preschool time, and am planning to copy ideas with wild ambition and no shame from two blogs I daydream about: Princess and the Tot’s Tot School and 1+1+1=1 Rock Stars Preschool. I have high hopes that laundry won’t be in a perpetual pile on our guest room bed. I love to cook, and it will make me insanely happy to know that I’m providing homemade meals, instead of depending on take out and dining out and the few things I put together and freeze on weekends. And I know all of this may sound incredibly mundane to some: cooking and cleaning and playing, but it’s a small window in our family’s life that I wouldn’t trade for the world.

I’m thrilled about and excited for the opportunity to stay at home, but will miss my BlogHer family. I’ll miss talking with the BlogHer community every day, I’ll miss scouting speakers, I’ll miss giving input on conference sessions, I’ll miss the crazy-chaotic conferences, and I’ll especially miss my co-workers. I’ve always said that the people you work with and the spirit of the company you work for play an enormous role in your professional contentment, and with that in mind, working for BlogHer has been the best job I’ve ever had. Around the office, we’re calling my departure a “long lunch break,” because you never know if there’s an hour when I might return. And while this job has been amazing -- a dream -- my heart has been wandering in other directions, and I’m leaping after it.

2011 was a bittersweet year. Highlights include Roger landing an amazing new job that he loves, which alone has made a significant difference in his personal and professional outlook. In the last few months, with the help of Roger's dad, we've gotten the door trim and window trim installed in our home, and it looks fantastic. The remodel is progressing! I've been more-off-than-on attending a playgroup for the past year, whenever I can fit it into my schedule, which has been great for Rayah and me. I'm looking forward to more of that group this year! And then lurking in the shadows of the year, in a deep, cavernous pit, is the traumatic and heartbreaking loss we suffered at the end of the year, one that colored all of 2011 for me, one that I'm not sure I'll ever explore on this website.

2012 should bring a lot of change for our little family, change that we expect will make our lives less chaotic, less stressful, more a leap of faith. Below are my Top Three Resolutions for 2012...Let's see how long it takes for me to forget about them:

1. Exercise More. Beginning in February, I'll have a bit more time on my hands. I'd like to spend some of that time exercising, whether it's while pushing Rayah in her stroller, or at the gym while she plays in kidcare. I just want to move more, instead of sitting sedentary behind my computer. Thankfully, this plan will go into action in late February, after all the folks with New Year's Resolutions have forgotten their Number One Resolution. (Losing weight.)

2. Make Better Food Choices. It's not like I cook or eat super unhealthfully (Unhealthfully? Is that a word? Is it unhealthily? Maybe I should make brushing up on the English language another Resolution.) - I avoid red meat, I don't eat much fried food - but I don't eat many vegetables, and I'd like to start. For me, this can be as simple as incorporating one salad each week into our meals (don't judge!), and trolling the internet for more vegetarian menus and recipes. (If you have a tried-and-true cookbook to recommend, please do!)

3. Community Groups. No one can accuse Roger and me of making rash decisions! We "dated" churches for about a year before finding one we liked in our area. Now we're "dating" community groups within that church. We'd love to find a lifegroup where we both feel at home, and I'm pretty sure it will be one of those decisions that just feels right in our gut. Community with a small group of believers in our home church is something that's been missing from our lives, and I'm so excited to join a group and begin building those relationships.

Those are my Top Three. I could go on and on, about changes I want to see to our family, to our home, to our budget; things I want to learn to do, things I want to do with Rayah, but I kind of just want to quit while I'm ahead, and maybe re-visit this list mid-year, to see how I'm doing. That way, I'll only have a 50% chance at failing at a FEW things on my list, rather than a 100% chance of failing at a LOT of things on my list.

Annnndddd...That is how I set myself up for New Year's Resolutions success.

After my husband and daughter, there are few things I love on earth more than food, in all its myriad forms: wandering grocery store aisles, discovering new eateries, spending time in my own kitchen. (And then, afterward, there are few things I love less than spending time cleaning in my own kitchen.) Baking and cookie are a labor of love for me, passed down through the generations.

One of my favorite Christmas traditions was baking cookies with my mother and grandmother, every kind of cookie you can imagine. My grandmother would have Tupperware after Tupperware piled high on her kitchen table, and when she ran out of room there, the containers of cookies would spill onto nearby chairs, counters, and the top of a nearby chest. It was insane, the number of cookies my mother and grandmother produced. In the thousands, I am sure. (And I say mother and grandmother, because most of my memories in the kitchen with them were when I was quite young; I did help some, but I did more cookie decorating and cookie eating than anything else. And it’s not even like I could get in trouble for sneaking a sweet here and there, because there were still so many left!)

But this recipe, Norwegian Delicacies, did not come from my given family. It came from my chosen family. I had never really had anything quite like it — maybe a cross between a sugared shortbread and a crescent cookie (some call them Mexican Wedding), but with the faintest hint of coconut. My mother-in-law (Hi, Mom!) has been making Norwegian Delicacies for more than fifty years. Though her own grandmother was from Norway, this recipe actually came from a Norwegian friend. Curious, as she pointed out, considering coconut isn’t exactly local produce in Norway.

I’ve made these cookies with my mother-in-law once, but I’ve eaten them on more than one occasion, and every single time it takes all the restraint in my body not to eat the entire batch. They’re crispy, light, sweet, and delicate, and if you catch them right out of the oven, they're slightly chewy in the center.

When I signed up for The Great Food Blogger Cookie Swap, I spent a lot of time mulling over which cookie to make. I wanted something unique, but also hardy enough to travel through the mail, and the more the idea tumbled around in my mind, I realized I knew exactly what I wanted to share with others, and with you. I hope you’ll find them as irresistible as I do.

NORWEGIAN DELICACIES
(Recipe from Sue Ferris, gratefully posted here with permission)

INGREDIENTS
1 cup unsalted butter, softened
1 cup original Crisco
2 cups sugar
1 cup finely grated coconut
1 teaspoon baking soda
1 teaspoon baking powder
3 cups sifted flour
- - -
2 cups powdered sugar

INSTRUCTIONS
Preheat your oven to 350.
1. Mix the first seven ingredients until thoroughly combined.
2. Form into 1” balls and flatten slightly.
3. Bake at 350 until light yellow and just barely golden around the edges, about 8 to 10 minutes.
4. Allow to cool 1-2 minutes on the baking sheet, then roll in powdered sugar while warm.
5. Set on a wire rack until completely cooled.

Yield: Approximately five dozen cookies.

The Great Food Blogger Cookie Swap
If you want to play along next year, sign up for the swap.

Thank you so much to MY Secret Cookie Swappers! For the past two or three weeks, I've been sampling goodies from Alaska, New York, and Tennessee! You can read all about the delicious cookies I received here:

• Chocolate Dipped Coconut Macaroons (with milk chocolate bases!) from A Taste of Alaska


• Chocolate Crack Cookies (with amaretto-soaked cherries!) from Vaikai ir Vanile


• Cowboy Cookies from Fashioned By Grace (Happily, Jessica from Fashioned by Grace has pictures of all three of these cookies on her site!)

I was sitting here working at my desk, minding my own business, when all of a sudden my brain said: "You need to eat marshmallows, dipped in chocolate, rolled in ground pistachios."

I don't know WHY I craved something so specific, or where this combo even came from, because I don't really ever eat marshmallows, dipped in chocolate, and then rolled in ground pistachios. In fact, I don't even really eat marshmallows dipped in chocolate. Mostly because I don't have the patience to wait for the chocolate to melt, and then to dip each individual marshmallow IN that chocolate. When I do get the urge to eat marshmallows, I've always just gone for the bag-to-hand-to-mouth method, and my brain has never complained about that before.

But when my brain speaks, I listen. Especially when I happen to have all the ingredients in my pantry. (Except I only had mini-marshmallows, not the larger version, and this is my note to self: Keep all sizes of marshmallows on hand, for future use.)

The good folks at Scharffen Berger gave me a few bars of chocolate to take home from BlogHer Food '11, so I threw a couple chunks into a microwaveable dish and it melted down so beautifully. I ground up 3 or 4 pistachios in my mortar and pestle--I'm always looking for excuses to use my mortar and pestle--and then dipped and rolled, dipped and rolled. It probably took me two minutes total to make this snack, and even less than that to eat it.

Sweet marshmallows, rolled in rich milk chocolate, and topped with salty pistachios? Yes, please!

If you ever invite me to a party, please don't ask me to bring deviled eggs, or boiled eggs, or any variation of a hard egg that isn't diced and mixed among other chunky ingredients. Because I'm really, really awful at peeling eggs. I just don't understand it! There is a repertoire of YouTube videos dedicated to this art, and still! My eggs look awful, every time. (I feel like it is appropriate to note here: there are lots of video tutorials showing how to peel off each end and blow to make the egg pop out one end. That is just gross, unless I'm the only one eating the egg, because then all my saliva is getting all over each egg. And don't tell me you don't spit just a little when blowing that hard to get an egg out. You do. Everyone does.)

I've tried boiling the water, using my egg timer, simmering the water, using a stopwatch, and...well, you can see my results. See that egg to the right? The one nestled within its shell? That's so you can see how I peel off entire chunks of egg with the peel. I need help. Egg help.

Is there an easier way to peel eggs? Some secret trick that doesn't involve spitting on them? Do tell.

We keep a coin jar high on a shelf in our closet. This morning I got that coin jar down and set it on the bed. Rayah sat next to me while I began counting out quarters for her, and I guess I wasn't going fast enough because she reached in, grabbed a handful of coins, slid off the bed, and then ran, laughing and shrieking toward her room.

She came back several seconds later, pennies and nickels spilling out of her little fist, to check on me. I just sat there, amused, while she slowly approached me. I grabbed her hand, and said: "Rayah, can you give me those coins?" She flung her body on the floor, crying.

"Rayah, Mommy wants to give you more valuable coins. You don't understand it now, but these quarters are worth more than those pennies. AND they're bigger, see?" I showed her one of the quarters.

She looked up at the quarter, looked at me, looked at the quarter, and beat her little fists and feet against the ground in protest. She didn't want the quarters. She wanted the pennies and nickels. And perhaps I should have just given in, perhaps I should have just let her keep those coins. But I couldn't. I'm her Mama. I want to give her so much more than she can comprehend.

So against her will, I opened her fingers and put the coins back in the jar. I scooped up the quarters, opened my hands before her, and offered her my coins instead. Tentatively, she sat up and reached for the bigger, shinier coins.

I hadn't expected to learn so much from my toddler this morning, but the whole situation reminded me of a Bible verse, Matthew 7:11, and how God desires to give us good things, if only we ask. Sometimes we hold onto things that are "good enough," and sometimes those things have to be pried out of our hands while we cry and protest, because we just can't comprehend how much better they can be if only we wait on God.

Rayah's tears dried quickly when she realized I was giving her more coins, and she happily carried them into her room, where we put them in her piggy bank. I'm looking forward to teaching her that she can trust her Mama to give her good things!

A few weeks ago, we found a field of bluebonnets near our home. A massive field of blue bonnets, about the size of ten football fields. In Texas, the Bluebonnet is the state flower. If you have children, it's sort of required that you take pictures of your offspring in such a field. And so we did, happily.

I know I'm biased, but I happen to think this little girl is the most precious, beautiful little girl EVER.

I loved watching her run through the flowers, squatting down to pick a few (Illegal in Texas! Don't tell!), and holding them up to her nose to SNIFF! SNIFF!

I never knew that one tiny little human could bring so much joy and love and FEELING into my life. I hear people say: "I don't remember my life before I had kids." That's not true for me. I remember my life well. I remember flying without a squirmy toddler on my lap, I remember running to the grocery store or to meet up with friends without worrying about nap schedules or whether I'd need to get a babysitter. I remember working an entire day without one single interruption, if I so chose. I remember movie marathons with Roger, just because we could. Life before having a child was a lot more convenient. But it was also a lot less full - I just didn't realize it at the time.

I can remember my life before I had a child, but I don't want to remember my life before Rayah. She is, magnificently, curiously, awesomely, our entire world right now.

For the past many weeks, I’ve been a bit obsessed with Easter. I’ve been reading Rayah Easter-related stories from her Bible for the past month, plus another Easter book that was a gift from a friend, and (dare I admit this?) I’ve been shopping for Easter supplies since the beginning of March. In fact, during one trip to Target, an employee told me: “You know it’s not even St. Patrick’s Day yet, right? We don’t have any Easter products in the store. I think you’re the first customer I’ve ever met who was ready for a holiday before we are!”

Maybe it’s just that I like any excuse to buy my daughter cute things.

Since I’ve been thinking about the holiday for so long, I have come up with tons of Easter basket ideas. (Or this would also be good for stocking stuffers, birthday baskets, or even “everyday I love you” gifts!) I can’t fit them ALL into my daughter’s Easter basket, so I thought I’d share the gift ideas with you – just in case you need fun ideas for kids’ Easter baskets that go beyond the ubiquitous candy and stuffed animals.

These items vary by age, but I’ve organized this list with items appropriate for younger children up top and older children down below. Where I have favorites to recommend, I have.

• Pacifiers
• Clothes!
• Baby Legs
• Teethers
• Rattles (we loved our Winkel!)
• DVDs (Rayah’s all-time fave are PraiseBaby videos)
• Bath toys
• Plush blanket
• Boo-boo bunny or cold pad (characters are awesome)
• Trumpette socks (boys or girls)
• Fun, colorful sippy cups
• Cute room accessories (like nightlights!)
• Sunglasses (I love the sunglasses at Janie & Jack, but the Target $1 bins have some really cute styles, too!)
• GIRLS - Hair bows and hair ties
• BOYS - Neck ties and bow ties
• Stickers (also great for inside Easter eggs)
• Books
• Bouncy balls
• Wind-up toys (also great inside Easter eggs) (You can get these for $1-$3 at Michael’s craft stores)
• Bubbles
• Crayons, markers or stamps
• Kaleidoscope
• Silly putty, play dough (also great inside Easter eggs)
• Sidewalk Chalk
• Flower pot/Packet of seeds (Target $1 bins)
• Harmonica (Rayah has this harmonica, she loves it!)
• Flip-flops or Crocs (depending on age)
• Toy cars (also great inside Easter eggs)
• Mini flashlight
• Action figures
• Jump ropes
• Fake tattoos (non-toxic)
• Piggy paints (non-toxic)

Sooo…what am I missing on this list? Are there items you’ve included in Easter baskets that I’m totally overlooking? I’d love to know!!

If you live in a warm climate, or if you love ice cream / popsicles, or if you have kids, or if you are a kid at heart, you should own a Zoku. (I am not being paid to say this.) (Though I'd willingly be paid, because I love this machine.) (I guess no one is going to pay me to say it after I've already said it. Ah, well.) Zoku makes instant homemade popsicles - because the unit is frozen, it only takes about 10-15 minutes per batch - which means that nearly as soon as you have a craving, you can have instant gratification. I love instant gratification.

So the other day I was thinking about my high school cafeteria. I don't know why I was thinking about this, it's really kind of a depressing thought, but my high school cafeteria had two things going for it: (1) the Otis Spunkmeyer chocolate chip cookies they sold for 25 cents each, all fresh from the oven and melty, and which to this day rank among the top 3 cookies I've ever longed for; and (2) the ice pops they sold for 35 cents. My absolute favorite were the Double Fudge Bullets.

It was Rayah's snack time, and it was the first day this Spring that Texas weather had reached 90 degrees, and I was thinking how I could totally go for a Double Fudge Bullet right about then. I remembered that my Zoku was stuffed in the back of the freezer, unused, and had been there for weeks. I spied the bananas sitting atop our fruit bowl, and I had leftover chocolate syrup from another recipe...and my plan formed, almost unintentionally. I was going to make Chocolate Banana Popsicles, and they were going to be good. And lo, it was so.

You don't have to have a Zoku to make these ice pops, but I will go on record saying that *if you do have a Zoku, making these treats will be a lot easier.* Here's how I did it:

YOU'LL NEED:
Popsicle molds (or Zoku, frozen)
1 cup milk
1/4 cup chocolate syrup
1 banana

HOW TO PREPARE
1. Mix the milk and chocolate syrup.
NOTE: You can skip this step if you already have chocolate milk on hand. Also, I tried this recipe with both skim milk and with whole milk, and neither seemed to make a substantial difference to the popsicle's creaminess. So I'd just use whatever you have on hand.

2. Mash the banana.
NOTE: I used a mortar and pestle because I love the novelty of it, but it's a lot easier to mash the banana with a fork on the plate. If you're using a Zoku, only mash 1/2 banana at a time, so that the flesh doesn't turn brown between batches.

3. Pour chocolate milk into popsicle mold until 1/3 full. Freeze.
NOTE: Be sure to add your popsicle sticks before freezing.

4. Spoon mashed banana into popsicle mold until 2/3 full. Freeze.
NOTE: To make this easier on yourself, use either (a) two spoons: one to spoon the banana into the mold and the handle of the second to prod the banana into place around the popsicle stick; or (b) a filled decorator's bag with a tip large enough to accommodate the thick texture of mashed banana but small enough to fit between the mold and the popsicle stick. Obviously, Option B is only for Super Particular People.

5. Pour chocolate milk into your popsicle mold, until full. Freeze.

[Yields: Approximately 6 ice pops, if molds hold 1/4 cup liquid each.]

I love that I can make popsicles out of fresh ingredients! And I also love justifying it as the equivalent of "a half glass of milk and part of a banana" if I accidentally ate three in one sitting. Not that I would do that, but you know, in case it ever does happen. Ahem.

Mother made, kid approved!

The weather in Texas has been beautiful the last week or two, with sunny days in the 70s, which means every cook has one thing on their mind: When can I fire up the grill? The other day I was preparing two chicken breasts* and a thought occurred to me... Now, I have to warn you. Sometimes crazy thoughts just pop into my mind from out of nowhere, like: If I punched a lion in the nose, would it surprise him long enough that I could get away, or just really piss him off? It seems to me he would be surprised, you know? Like: What human has ever punched a lion in the nose? No one. Ever. That's what makes it so genius. Not that I'm wandering around wanting to punch animals, but if it was between that and being EATEN ALIVE, I'd start swinging. I'm just sayin'. Anyway. So this crazy thought occurred to me when I was prepping the chicken for the grill:

What would happen if I tried to grill an egg?

I KNOW, right? I'm not talking about frying an egg or scrambling an egg on the grill - I mean a whole egg. Inside its shell. Like a hard-boiled egg, except it would be...hard-grilled, I guess. Roger gave me kind of a crazy look when I set the egg on the grill, but whatever, after nearly seven years of marriage he's gotten used to my wild hairs and questionable antics in the kitchen. We decided to make a game of it: which would be fully cooked first: the chicken or the egg?

Judging by how long it takes to boil eggs (Do you have this egg timer? It is the best, EVER. And I'm giving away THREE today!), I guessed the chicken would be cooked through first. There was really no way to tell whether the egg was done, other than eyeing it suspiciously, so we decided to take it off the grill at the same time as the chicken and crack it open veerrrrrryyyyy carefully over a plate. After it had cooled down, because that egg was HOT.

Turns out that I was wrong - the grilled egg cooked through first, as evidenced by its somewhat rubbery texture compared to the moist chicken. It was fun to try, though. I'm excited to try to grill a whole egg again - and I'll time it, the next go-round - to make a perfect hard-grilled egg.

* (super easy recipe: crush 6 saltine crackers, mix with 1 tsp chicken fajita seasoning and 1 tsp renaissance fair rub - if you don't have renaissance fair rub (I mean, really, who does? Besides me?) just leave it out - this recipe also works really well for baking) (350F for 20 minutes)

ENTER THE GIVEAWAY

This clever, color-changing egg timer goes into the water at the same time as your eggs, and takes into account the number of eggs, water used, altitude and your desired level of cooked egg, from soft- to hard-boiled. It is also dishwasher safe!

NPR published an article last month that has been haunting me, and this is why: it pretty much said that if I don't speak 2100 words per hour to Rayah, she won't grow up to be a high achiever. She won't be as intelligent as she has the potential to be.

I mean, basically. It might have said more than that. That 2100 words per hour? It scares me a little. I don't know if I think 2100 words per hour. That seems like a lot of words. So for the past month, I've been going out of my way to talk even more to Rayah than I already was. Instead of saying, "Rayah, let's put your shoes in your shoe bin!", I say: "Rayah, let's pick up your brown sneakers with the velcro closures and carry them to your closet, where we can put them into your shoe bin!" See that? I took a simple nine-word sentence and snuck in an extra 17 words. Impressive, right?

Except I don't feel impressive when I'm saying it. I feel like I'm overwhelming my 17-month-old daughter with an instruction that could have been a lot more concise. Now, I'll be the first to admit: I don’t do this with every sentence – my brain just doesn’t work that quickly to remember every time. But I do it often enough to induce a lot of eye-rolling at myself. Rayah has awesome comprehension - she knows exactly what to do when I tell her to take her shoes to her shoe bin...but for all that extra talking, she can't get a word in edge-wise. Which leaves me to wonder if the NPR article was right.

The article was a study conducted over a period of three years, following 40 families -- "rich, poor and in between" -- transcribing EVERY WORD that was said to the children of those families for the first three years of their lives. Every. Word. They analyzed the results, and this is what they found:

"In the end, the finding that most struck people was not about the quality of the speech -- how often rich versus poor parents asked questions or positively affirmed their children -- but about the quantity. According to their research, the average child in a welfare home heard about 600 words an hour while a child in a professional home heard 2,100."

Why does that number matter? The reason this study was conducted in the first place was because they were "trying to teach underprivileged kids how to speak like the children of professors at the University of Kansas." They failed time and time again to expand the vocabularies of the four-year-olds, hoping that if they succeeded, the underprivileged kids might go on to experience similar academic achievements as their wealthier peers. Their report concluded:

"That adds up. [They] estimated that by the age of 4, children of professional parents had heard on average 48 million words addressed to them while children in poor welfare families had heard only 13 million. It was no wonder that the underprivileged children they saw at their preschool could not catch up and often lagged behind once they went to school. They simply weren't getting the experience with language provided to their peers."

As a work-at-home-mom who is also a stay-at-home-mom, I'm the first to say that I don't spend as much time pouring into my daughter as I'd like to. I work during Rayah's naps, which buys me about 4 hours throughout the day. I work while she plays independently, which is another hour or so throughout the day. I work while she watches her Praise Baby video, the only show she's mesmerized by, which buys me another 30-45 minutes. If it's nice outside, she'll play in the backyard while I sit at the patio table, working, for another 30 minutes before I join her. After she goes to bed, I work for another two to four hours, depending on how much is left on my plate, what kind of deadlines I'm up against, and how much I was able to accomplish throughout the day. On days I have childcare (aka my Mom), I'll try to hole up in a room and be as efficient as possible. And then there are the weekends, when I’ll often respond to emails and take care of certain tasks to lighten my load during the week.

Mostly, I just feel like a failure. A failure at work, because I've never reconciled in my brain that it's okay not to work standard 8a-6p hours -- I worked in corporate America for far too long to wholly believe that, and so I intermittently work 8a to 12am or so, trying to balance time with my daughter with my responsibilities at work. A failure at home because there is a laundry pile on our guest bed that needs to be folded, and it is usually about two feet tall; because I am *really* good at making messes - see also: anytime I cook - and not as great at picking them up; because I have a ridiculously long list of Things To Do with Rayah, and either I can't do them because my schedule gets in the way, or I can't do them because her nap schedule gets in the way; because I don't know if I'm talking to her enough, or playing with her enough, but considering the amount of time she plays alone and entertains herself, I'm thinking the answer is a resounding "no." [This is not a commentary on traditional roles in the family, though those do work for my husband and me. He helps tremendously around the house, when he's home. Unfortunately, his work demands regular 70-80 hour weeks, which means he leaves home before we get up in the morning, and usually gets home between 8-10pm, sometimes much later. He is one of the most ethical people I know, and works so very hard to provide for our family.]

Someone has suggested that I just put our daughter in daycare, and every time I hear that, I remember my daycare days from 1987 and become a little bit depressed. I don't want to leave my daughter in a center with germy children who will teach her to hit and bite; with adults who won't care as much as I do whether she eats foods with high fructose corn syrup, or whether she has a quiet place to sleep each morning and afternoon. And I know that daycare has improved a lot in the past 25+ years, but I still believe that the right place for her is home, with me. I am so blessed, so thankful that I am in a position where I get to make that choice, because I know that many parents would love to stay home with their children, to see them all day, every day, and can’t. It's not something I take for granted.

And that means I go out of my way to make her days active and fun, even if it means I go to bed later than my body would prefer. I talk with her about everything in her world, from her shoes to the airplanes overhead to the color of leaves and why some don't fall from the trees in winter. I'm paranoid about pulling extra books to read to her, to make sure we hit that lofty 2100 words per hour hanging over my head, and I've gone so far as to count the number of words in her favorites (including titles, not including anything we discuss in the book, etc):

Goodnight Moon: 128
In My Nest: 36
I Love You, Good Night: 97
The Little Mouse, The Red Ripe Strawberry and The Big Hungry Bear: 158
That’s Not My…(Bunny, Dinosaur, etc.): 48

All together, that’s 467 words if I were to read all five of those books to her once EACH HOUR. That alone doesn’t even get me to the 600 minimum. I talk to Rayah a great deal throughout the day, but I’m convinced it’s not nearly enough. So now I’m REALLY wondering how some parents speak 2100 words PER HOUR to their infants/toddlers. (Not 2100 words spoken within their earshot – the words must be spoken TO the children.) Is that even possible? What do you think? Do you hit that 2100 mark, easy, or are you going to be just as haunted by this as I am?

[This post? Just over 1,400 words. STILL NOT ENOUGH. Also: if you have favorite children's books, I'd love to know what they are!]

Instead, I taught her how to use Netflix, and showed her the extensive collection of movies that Roger has amassed. I explained how to stream news live from the Internet - because we have fast Internet, a benefit afforded us by living in The City. (My mom lives in the country. She has two options for Internet: dial-up (it's true - it still exists) or a mobile broadband USB, both of which are s-l-o-w compared to my connection at home.)

The decision was very easy for us. We never watch television. After months and months and months and years of "nothing good being on", we decided that paying $60/month was ridiculous for something we never used. It would be like - and this is totally hypothetical (wink, wink) - paying for a gym membership each month that we don't use. (Oh. Wait.) Nearly everything we want to see is available live streamed online, or through Netflix, or we already own it. And so we canceled our cable, and we haven't really missed it. In fact, it's been kind of a relief not to sit down in front of the television and mindlessly wander between channels.

With that in mind, I thought it would be fun to share my favorite (instant streaming) Netflix finds, since I enjoy immediate gratification and TV shows so much. In no particular order (if you watch any of these -- even though the shows are designed to be stand-alone episodes -- please do yourself a favor by putting the show into context: start with Season 1, Episode 1):

1. Drop Dead Diva - A cute and funny show about a shallow, aspiring model who came back to life as a plus-size lawyer. It's a total fluff show, and I've loved relaxing in the evenings watching it. (Roger would probably hate that I'm telling you this, so no one say anything, but he's watched a few episodes with me and he totally likes the show, too. Hey - it's easier to get forgiveness than permission.) You'd probably enjoy it if you liked Legally Blonde. Or if you ever worked in a law office. Or if you like fashion.

2. Kidnapped - An intense, heart-pumping drama about a young boy who is, yes, kidnapped. The story unfolds as you learn to suspect everything and everyone. (I told Roger he would also like this one, because it's all thriller-and-intense. He doubts me, because he thinks I don't have very good taste in TV shows. But OMG, I totally do.) You'd probably enjoy this if you liked 24, or Ransom, or investigative dramas.

3. Bones - The show that started it all. I didn't start watching TV shows on Netflix until I discovered Bones, which has maybe replaced CSI (Vegas) as my favorite crime drama. Bones forensically explores death and crime from an anthropological viewpoint to solve mysteries - both recent and from hundreds of years ago. You'd enjoy this show if you liked any other show listed in this post, or CSI, Cold Case, Without a Trace, etc. I love, love, love, love Bones.

4. Veronica Mars - Veronica is a high school student and detective. This show is smart and sassy, and I may have been upset when the series ended. I also might have petitioned Roger for my own pair of binoculars. You'd enjoy this show if you liked Without A Trace, the less gruesome episodes of CSI, Cold Case, etc.

5. Psych - A witty comedy *and* an investigative drama? Be still my heart! The main character is a "psychic" who helps a police department solve crimes. He's not actually psychic, he's just really good at reading evidence. You'd enjoy this show if you liked Bones or CSI, or if you want to sharpen your own powers of observation.

I love detective shows. That much should be evident. (Sidenote: Has anyone seen Veronica Mars who also watched Psych? Am I the only one who thinks Veronica and Shawn would make the *perfect* TV couple?!)

I don't explore the movie section of Netflix that often, though I think I should. Do you have favorites to recommend?

The past couple weeks have been a bit of a blur. A few days after coming home from San Diego, I launched a giveaway - the winners have been notified - and then Rayah and I left for Nashville, where we attended BlissDom '11. Now, to be fair: Rayah was hardly with me at the conference - her Aunt and Cousin drove in from Winston Salem to hang out with her for the week - and it afforded me the opportunity to network with other bloggers without the distraction of a very busy toddler. A very busy toddler that I missed - I didn't know how much my heart would ache to be near her, even knowing she was just a hallway away - so I snuck off to see her for a few minutes during most breaks. This is what I often found her doing:

[Touching all the flowers | Playing in the dirt]

Sticking her head through the banisters and looking over the edge.

A lot of my family doesn't really understand why I go to blogging conferences, or even what one is or what one does at a blogging conference. So let me tell you: they are a little addictive.

You learn about writing better, and how to do business in your little corner lot of the Internet. You pick up tips and tricks for editing your content, be it written or photographed or videoed. You meet brands that are sponsoring the event, and some bloggers build relationships with those brands to do business down the road. You discover new bloggers that become immediate friends, people you can't imagine not being in your life. And you wish you could live in their same city, just to spend more time with them. You spend the weekend tweeting, flickring, blogging and facebooking. And it's cool.

At BlogHer '10, someone said: "In the elevator, someone asked me what the conference was all about. My answer - women who are changing the world one blog post at a time." It's about people banding together in community, not anonymity. I love that!

Now that we're home again, our pace has slowed. We're settling back into our normal routine. I've made it through only a handful of the business cards I exchanged at BlissDom, and there are so many more stacked, taunting me, waiting for me to send a message on Twitter or scope out new blogs to add to my feedreader. I'm getting there, slowly. Slowly.

Have you ever been to a blogging conference? What made you decide to go? Why have you hesitated? Or have you decided they're not for you? If you'll be at any upcoming blogging conferences in 2011, please let me know. I'd love to meet up!

That's how my nickname, Oats, began. It stuck because after I responded so enthusiastically, I laid down the law of what must be included on that oatmeal buffet (among other offerings): cinnamon, brown sugar and raisins. Specifically, the raisins had to be black (not the golden kind, which she had originally slated, because the golden kind blend in too well in your bowl). And so it was.

This past week, while in San Diego planning for BlogHer '11, the Marriott included something special on the breakfast buffet the last morning our team was in town: Oatmeal Crème Brûlée.

Did anyone else just hear a chorus of angels, or was that only me?

Let me repeat that for added effect: Oatmeal! Creme Brulee! A combination of one of the best breakfast foods, with my absolute, all-time favorite dessert? Yes, please! I'm applauding the inventor of this delicious combination - creamy, melt-in-your-mouth oatmeal, sweetened with a hardened sugar glaze and rich, melted butter pooled in the center. The Marriott topped it with thin-sliced, bubbling hot peaches, and I knew the moment it hit my tastebuds that I'd need to re-create it in my kitchen.

Oatmeal Crème Brûlée

INGREDIENTS
1.5 cups oats
3 cups milk
1 t vanilla
12 thin peach slices (about 1/8" thick)
4 T extra-fine white sugar
2 T organic brown sugar

INSTRUCTIONS
1. Over medium heat, stir together oats, milk and vanilla. Cook, stirring frequently, until oats absorb liquid and take on a thick consistency.
2. Spoon cooked oats equally into four ramekins and arrange three peach slices atop each oatmeal portion.
3. Blend sugars, then divide equally (approximately 1.5 T each) among the four ramekins and spread evenly on top.
4. Using a torch, melt the sugar and form a crispy top.
5. Allow the oatmeal creme brulee to sit for at least 5 minutes before serving.

NOTES
A. If you haven't tried organic brown sugar, you're missing out. It's got an amazing flavor and texture - waaaaayyyyy better than regular brown sugar. You can thank me later for introducing you.
B. I don't have a torch, so I used my broiler instead. It melted the butter, but didn't form a crispy top. I'm not sure why, but it's possible I didn't leave it in for long enough. I think I was too afraid of burning the sugar to a charcoaled crsip.
C. You don't need to add extra sugar or sweetener to the oatmeal while cooking - this topping will partially absorb into the oatmeal beneath it, and it will be plenty sweet. Eating this is almost like eating dessert.

THE GIVEAWAY!

Incidentally, this coincided with National Oatmeal Month (probably something to do with all those "Be More Healthy" resolutions for New Year's). In celebration, Better Oats sent me samples of their oatmeal and offered to give away a one-month-supply of their oatmeal to ten Chirky.com readers! I had never tried Better Oats before, but after researching their company and taste-testing their product, giving away their oatmeal on this site was a no-brainer. Besides serving up delicious food (which, let's face it, is the most important criteria - the Better Oats instant oatmeal doesn't have that chemical taste that I've disliked in so many other instant oatmeal brands), they make it easy for me to like them:

• The carton packaging is 100% recyclable, unlike the waxboard cartons of other brands.
• Each packet is pre-measured in 1/4 cup portions, and the packet itself doubles as a measuring cup. (The bottom of the fill line is 1/2 cup liquid, the top of the fill line is 2/3 cup liquid.)
• The packets are super-portable, perfect for a busy mom to an on-the-go toddler. I've already stashed a couple in the diaper bag for emergency meals.
• The oatmeal is made from 100% whole grain oats, with added flax seeds for an extra dose of Omega-3. Nutritious!
• Better Oats offers a ton of varieties, from plain to fruity to cinnamon to maple and brown sugar to -- get this! -- chocolate. (Why did I never think of adding chocolate to my oatmeal? YUM!)
• For every coupon downloaded from their site, Better Oats will donate a bowl of oatmeal to local food banks.

So! To the good part: the giveaway! I want to know your favorite way to serve/eat oatmeal. Do you like it plain? With certain spices or fruits or sweeteners? Do you come down hard on the cooking method line between milk vs. water? Do you have a favorite recipe using oatmeal? To receive an entry:

(1) entry - Leave a comment answering the question above

(1) additional entry - Leave a separate comment letting me know you've tweeted this blog post (using this shortened URL: http://bit.ly/eQGF4H)

(1) additional entry - Leave a separate comment linking back to your own blog entry, pointing your readers to this giveaway

The contest is open beginning NOW, and closing 11:59pm on Monday, January 31, 2011. Ten winners will be selected at random to win a one-month supply of Better Oats oatmeal.

Now tell me...Did you already know about Oatmeal Creme Brulee? Am I the last to find out? And do you have a better recipe than mine? I made it up off-the-cuff, so I'm pretty sure there's room for improvement! I think I'm officially on a quest to find the best Oatmeal Creme Brulee, ever, ever, ever.

* * * UPDATED! Winners have been selected via Random.org and were notified Feb 1, 2011! * * *

Though this post was compensated with free product, my good opinion of products cannot be bought. I genuinely liked BetterOats instant oatmeal, and hope that you will, too!