Chirky

Oh, honey, my heart is breaking for you right now. I'm sending lots of love your way.

Jes, I'm so, so sorry. How awful when you'd been so excited. Sending prayers your way.

I'm so sorry.

Crap, crap, crap.

I wish you were here so I could hug you. I'm so, so, so damn sorry. I went through the exact same thing with my first pregnancy and I can tell you that with time the pain will begin to fade. I too waited to miscarry, always hoping the drs. were wrong but after a month I had to have the d&c. I know you probably don't feel like talking but if you want to vent or talk I'm here. I'm emailing you my number right now.

When my mom was pregnant the first time there were complications and she too had to have a d&c. Two months later she got pregnant with me. I know she still hurts when she thinks of her lost child but when I was questioning why this happened to me she reminded me that if it hadn't have happened to her then I wouldn't be here today. At some point you have to trust that God, destiny or the universe is working for you...even if it's in ways that you never imagined you could live through.

Sending you such love.

I'm sorry.

Oh, my, I'm so sorry.

My heart is breaking for you, but I know it's nothing like what you are going through.

Sending prayers of comfort to you and your family, wish there was something I could do.

{{hugs}}
Steph

Wait - I didn't even know you were pregnant! Did I miss something?

:( I'm so sorry to hear about you losing your baby. So sad. Like you said, though, perhaps the baby wasn't healthy. Not that it makes it any easier.

Sending hugs your way and thinking of you and Roger.

I found you via a tweet from Jenny. I am also someone who experienced this, almost exactly as you are right now. I opted for testing. It was a genetic abnormality. There was never any hope. That didn't make it hurt any less. Everywhere I went I saw babies, pregnant moms, I just couldn't escape. We wanted her so much. How could she be gone? How could she never have a chance to be anything at all?

Take time to mourn. Take all the time you need. I'm a total stranger but I'm sending you the best thoughts and hope for the future.

I have no words, other than to thank you for sharing this experience so honestly and so poignantly and to tell you how deeply, deeply sorry I am. Sorry doesn't help right now, though, I know. Wish I knew the magic words to make the pain go away... Rev 21:3-4 might help... Sending comforting thoughts and prayers your way.

I am so sorry for your loss. I'm just so sorry this cup has been passed to you.

God bless you and your baby...

So sorry!

Sorry about your loss, that's so disappointing and hard. Just like Jenny, I had the same thing happen twice, at 8 weeks & 12 weeks. I ended up with D&Cs, after weeks of waiting each time, also hoping the doctors were wrong. The first time was painful and scary and in the middle of the night, so the second time I waited a couple of weeks and scheduled the D&C. The second time, the doctor called (because they test the removed tissue) and said she was very glad they did it, because it was a partial molar pregnancy and could've caused serious harm to my future health if they hadn't removed every bit of tissue. Sorry if that sounds utilitarian, but back then I wish I could've had something to help decide.

I know it's coming from a stranger, but I'd encourage you to just do what feels right to you, so you won't have regrets. I have three beautiful kids now by the way.

Good thoughts coming your way, and all the best to you.

Kim

I have no words but I'm sorry. I have never heard it put in to words that way and it breaks my heart. I'll be praying for you.

There are no words, only feelings and thoughts I can offer. I'll be thinking of you and your family over the next while. I am so terribly sorry for this. *hugs*

I am so sorry the innocence of pregnancy has been taken away from you. Your story brought back the painful memories of my own experience and I am so sad that you have to walk this path. You have honored your child in such a special way with this tribute, and you have helped so many women by articulating the pain we can only feel. Don't be strong for anyone right now, just be what you need to be to get through this. With kindness...

Thinking of you.

Came here because of a tweet from Jenny,The Bloggess...
I am so sorry. I miscarried my first pregnancy too and I know how horrible you feel right now. I went to the ER because it was very early in the morning. I walked away from the desk 3 times because it took me that long to actually say the words "I think I'm having a miscarriage."
One of my co-workers brought in her newborn just days later and I couldn't even look at him. I hid in the staff lounge crying into my locker until she left. Then my best friend got pregnant BY MISTAKE, then my niece got pregnant BY MISTAKE. I was so sad and so angry.
BUT IT GETS BETTER! I have two little girls now. I will tell you that I was probably seven months pregnant with my oldest before I stopped checking for blood everytime I went to the bathroom.
It will be okay.

So so so sorry Jes.

Oh Jes...my heart goes out to you sweetheart. Wish I was there to wrap my arms around you. xoxo

Oh, Jes. I am so, so sorry. Much love.

I'm so so so very sorry, Jes.

Please know you're in my thoughts and prayers...and will be.

Audrey

I'm so sorry. There really is nothing anyone can say, because it sucks horribly. It does. It's just absolutely unbearable.

It does get better. It takes time, but it does. But nothing anyone can say can make it any better.

I'm so sorry.

I am so incredibly sorry.

Jenny's tweet will have many people thinking of you and sharing your sorrow, even if only for a few moments. I hope that lightens the load just a tiny bit for you.

Wishing you the time to grieve in your own way, and then peace. I'm so sorry for your loss.

May God comfort you in your grieving. I'm truly sorry for your loss.

sent by blogess jenny to wish you hope and wellness. I've had two miscarriages myself -each different, but sad and painful and confusing. I'm here for you.
to let you know, Oct 15th is remembrance day for infant and neonatal loss. I lit a candle last night & I will again tonight for you.

I'm so sorry for you.

Oh jeezus... your wonderful writing has given such life to this terrible void... I can only hope that others in this sad hell will be hugged by your story, finding some slim comfort in your eloquent intimacy. Thank you for putting it into words...

I'm really sorry to hear about your loss. My wife and I lost a child about a year and a half ago; it hurts terribly - I can relate to your situation some, but I know the experience is unique for everyone. In any case, know that people (who don't even know you, in this case) are thinking of you and you have their support.

I also volunteer for Houston's Aid in Neonatal Death (http://www.hand.net) - I don't know if I/we can do anything to help from here in Houston, but if we can, please contact us via the web site.

Best wishes,

Stephen, in Houston

You are in my prayers.

This happened to me. I was 34, finally pregnant and 11 weeks along, and at the end of the workday, I discovered that I was bleeding. I started a natural miscarriage, but my doctor finished it for me with a D&C.

As it turns out, sexual reproduction is fraught with errors, and miscarriage is much more common than we realize. In many cases, I believe that nature is being kind by ending the pregnancy so early.

I did have a baby 18 months later. She is now 20 years old, and studying mathematics in college. I love her deeply - she is the best thing my husband and I have done together. I am confident that your story will move to another chapter, as mine did.

Praying for you.

I have been where you are, and I know how much it hurts. somehow the other pregnant women in the OB's office make it all the harder to bear. I wish you comfort in your grief.

I am so sorry for your loss. And I am also here because of the Bloggess' tweet.

This happened to me, too. I was 34, finally pregnant and 11 weeks along, and at the end of the workday, I discovered that I was bleeding. I started a natural miscarriage, but my doctor finished it for me with a D&C.

As it turns out, sexual reproduction is fraught with errors, and miscarriage is much more common than we realize. In many cases, I believe that nature is being kind by ending the pregnancy so early.

I did have a baby 18 months later. She is now 20 years old, and studying mathematics in college. I am confident that your story will move to another chapter, as mine did.

Thoughts and prayers to you and your husband during this time. It seems that the thing you want to see the least while you are out will always be the one that presents itself front and center. Put your blinders on, realize they are there all the time and they just stick out more now than they usually do and take very good care of yourself.

Blessings to you. What a hard thing to go through. I'm sorry....

My heart breaks for you. My husband and I have never been able to have children. Two years ago my little sister was pregnant and everyone was so excited, however; when Aron was born he had an extra chromosone and his heart was enlarged. We had to make the decision to let him go to heaven. That was the worst thing I have ever been through and he wasn't even my own. The good news though, my sister just gave birth to a happy, healthy little girl.

You will someday too. You are in my prayers during this tough time. Hugs!!!!

I am so terribly sorry for your tragic loss. You are so wise to see that God has a plan for all of us. I am sure He will see you through this difficult time.

Sending you prayers and warm wishes for less pain soon!

another person from the blogess.

i am so very sorry for your loss. i, too, miscarried after having my first child. i was devastated, and every year, when that child would have had a birthday, i think of him.

i did ultimately have a baby after that loss. i never forgot the child in between; maybe he taught me to be especially grateful for the beautiful babies i have.

please take good care of yourself.

It was at 10 weeks for me. No warning, went in for regular check-up, ready to see the heartbeat... except there wasn't one. Ended up with half of the miscarriage occurring naturally and then a D and C for the other half. "Blighted ovum" was the diagnosis. I didn't have the heart to pursue it further.
I went on to have a second beautiful, healthy baby girl who is now 12. But I'll never forget the one I didn't get to have. Grieve in whatever way you need to, for as long as you need to. Your child deserves that and so do you,
Prayers going up for you...

The bloggess sent me your way and I was reading this on my way home from work just sobbing and sobbing for your pain. I've unfortunately been through the same thing years ago and although its gotten easier to deal with as time has passed, the hurt is still there. I'll be keeping you in my thoughts and prayers and I hope you and your husband will find comfort in each other during this time!

I found you through the Bloggess' tweet today. I've never experienced what you are going through, but please know I'm sending you all the good thoughts that I can. One of my good friends had a miscarriage before having a very healthy son. We don't know why these things happen, but that doesn't make it easier to deal with. Praying that you recover quickly and are able to move on from here stronger.

Sent by the Bloggess. I am so sorry to read this. All I can offer is blessings and Internet support.

Lost my second pregnancy/baby at 12 weeks and was devastated. Less than a year later, I gave birth to my daughter after a healthy uneventful pregnancy.

Acknowledging your grief,your loss, your pain and hoping for good things for you and your husband in the future.

Oh, my God! Jes! I don't even have the words to say how awful that is. I'm so sorry.

Hey Jes, I can't imagine how it feels but I hurt for you. I am praying for you guys. Here is the blog of a friend's sister who lost their sweet baby Copeland to trisonomy-18: http://conorbootheandgirls.blogspot.com/
September marked a year since her passing, if you want to go back and follow their journey. She is very eloquent about her journey and maybe God can use her words to comfort you somehow. * hugs *

I'm sorry, Jes.

I'm so very sorry for your loss. *gentle hugs*

Another person here to offer support because of Jenny's tweet. For what it's worth, thank you for sharing your grief with us. I can't even begin to fathom what you're going through, and I'm so very sorry. No amount of "what's going to be" will ever totally take away the pain of "what could have been," and there's no getting around how much that sucks. Hang in there.

I've been there, and it sucks. It still hits me sometimes a year later. I'm sorry that your family is experiencing such pain and loss when it should be such a joyful time. I'm thinking of you guys.

Ow, my heart.

I am speaking peace for you and your husband; I hope that you will be able to feel it.

I am so sorry for your loss, I was sent your way via Jenny. It has been 13 months since I had my DNC, and I can honestly tell you that that I still feel a twinge when I see a pregnant woman or a brand new baby- shame, jealousy, anger, dispair, why me? You will find out over the next few weeks and months that people you never knew had been pregnant had miscarried, and they will be there for you to lean on those days when you're heart is broken wide open.

Hang in there- we're all here if and when you need us.

I am so sorry. There are no words to comfort you.

Let all the emotions work through - the disappointment, the anger, your life will never be the same again but you have a little angel who will be part of your life forever. And don't forget you have each other. You have both suffered a loss. Love and comfort each other in this time.

I am so so sorry. I understand your pain and wish there was some way to ease it for you. We have had losses as well and know how hard the loss of hopes and dreams of that precious lil one is.
Sending huge hugs,
Katrina

I'm sorry. I wish it wasn't this way.

Knot

I lost my first pregnancy too. I'm so sorry. I know how devastating it is.

Your loss is difficult but I will pray the lord will bless you and your husband in the days and years to come. Take care of yourself.

I am so very sorry. It is devastating to miscarry a baby that you want so badly. I wish this weren't happening to you.

As Jett said, "Ow, my heart."

My heart has also broke for you. I love you sweetie and I'm always here for you.

Visiting from Stirrup Queens...I am so, so sorry. Losing a much wanted, much cherished baby sucks no matter how early or how late it happens. Many prayers for you and I hope you never have to experience this again.

Oh Jes, I'm so sorry for your loss! Hugs and prayers are all I have to offer so you have those in abundance.

I'm so, so sorry. I too went through a very similar experience and my heart is breaking for you. You are in my thoughts and prayers.

sending lots of love and healing energies. I'm so very very sorry.

Jes,

Jayne, Lisa's Mom here.

Our prayers are with you.

This also happened to me with my first, but worse than that, the second one too.

I was young, had never been to see a gynecologist before. I was too afraid to go before, but I had to go now - but where? to who? I looked in the yellow pages and found an add that looked good. I made an appointment but I was scared to death. I had to go by myself and never having done this before, with a strange man looking at me there and touching me I thought, "how could I do this, and do this bleeding so badly?" Crying and scared I knew I just lost my baby, and I was scared of what this strange man was going to do or say to me. He proceeded to exam me. I was bleeding so badly and all he could tell me was "Miss, you could be pregnant or you could of had a miscarriage. If the bleeding doesn't get any better in a month, come back in for another check." Was this all he could tell me? I am hemorrhaging, and all he can say is this? Well, I knew I was pregnant, so it had to be the latter. I was beside myself.

But, I got threw it, at least I thought I did. The bleeding did slow down and became more regular. This was in early December when I lost the first baby. For the next 14 months my boobs hurt all the time, I was crampy and sick 24/7. I was being called a hypochondriac and didn't know why. I knew I was sick, but everyone else thought I was just overreacting to my loss. Fourteen months later I became pregnant again with my second child. It only lasted two months and I miscarried again. I was told that I needed to have a D&C to clean me out. When all was done and the Doctor came in he started asking question's about my first pregnancy. I asked why and he indicated that the reason I lost the second child was because I was actually toxic this whole past year from the fetus parts that were left inside of me from the previous miscarriage.

So please, if you have not had this done, it is important to get a D&C. Three months later that I became pregnant again with Laura, which is Lisa's older sister. And three months after Laura was born I got pregnant with Lisa.

Our prayers and love are with you Jes.

Here from Jenny's tweet.

Yes, me too, my first pregnancy... it ended at 11 weeks, woke up in the morning to bleeding, had been ready to take a trip that day, but instead spent it at the doctor, ended up having a D&C. And yes, I know about how it seems so hard to see babies for awhile after that. Or to think that you might be able to have one yourself.

What I did learn from this, is that the healing begins when you can talk about it. Others have helped me, and I hope the comments here can help you.

I now have two wonderful sons, who are the world to me :)

Hugs and peace to you.

Sorry sorry, Jess. Big hugs and massive prayers sent your way.

God bless.

Oh dear... I am so sorry. I had an eptopic pregnancy at 8 weeks a few years back. When I walked into my OB's office, the receptionist happily handed me one of the new pregnancy packets with all of the goodies in it. She didn't know... but I wanted to throw it back in her face.
Can I recommend a DNC? With the bleeding when you do it naturally, you just never know how long that can last. The DNC is quick, painless and will help you to physically feel better soon. Plus, they give you some nice drugs which help to dull the pain.

My heart goes out to you. I am so sorry for your loss. I do have other kids now but think often of the day I get to meet the baby I never knew.

D&C... sorry, not DNC.

Big hug.

Jes, I'm so sorry. There are no words that make it any better right now, but as trite as it sounds, time will help. You and Roger are in our prayers...

I have said that same prayer myself, and I am trying to trust too. It doesn't make it easier. I am so sorry for your loss.

Jes. I am very sorry. There's nothing I can say to make it any better, but know that my prayers are with you.

Much love to you both.

Oh, sweetie, so sorry. I will keep the highest thoughts for you that you will have your dreams fulfilled...and soon.

Jes-

I am so so sorry you are going through this right now. I almost lost Cooper in the beginning stages because my hcg levels were so low, so I know a little bit where you are coming from. I know it is hard right now, but it will get easier and I've known several people who have experienced this kind of a start and ended with a healthy pregnancy soon after. I know that doesn't take away the pain right now, but have faith in God and know that He will provide for you and Roger when it is time. Let me know if I can do anything for either of you.

Melissa

Jes, my heart is breaking for you right now. I remember when I was going through a hard time in my marriage, you left a comment on my blog that really touched me. You told me you'd thought of what to say so that it wasn't trite. Your words stuck with me, all these months, and meant so much to me. I wish I could do the same for you right now... offer you just a little comfort right now. I wish I was there to scoop you up in my arms and listen. Maybe with a delicious slice of that Key Lime Pie you love (I would even make it from scratch for you!). Much love.

So sorry for you, Jes. I'll keep you in my thoughts and prayers.

I am so sorry.... I am sorry my only words are empty and have no comfort for you right now.
Yet, all I have is Im so sorry....
I have no doubt that babies are in the stars for you.

I am so sorry, Jes. :(

I am so sorry for your loss. Prayers!

I am so sorry. :(

I wish I could give you a hug right now. I know what a hard time this is for you, I had a miscarriage at 11 weeks. It's so devastating how you go from hope to absolute despair in about 2 seconds.
Thankfully we went on to have a beautiful healthy baby boy not too long after. You'll get through this.

jeremiah 29:11

cling to it. claim it. you are HIS. i love you, my friend.

hugs to you!

I'm so sorry. You will be in my thoughts.

I am so deeply sorry, Jes. Be very gentle with yourself and please know we are all out here, lifting you up in our thoughts and prayers.

Damn.
I am so, so sorry.
I hate this for you.

Be gentle with yourself.

Allow yourself to be taken care of.

you are held in the Light,
Angie

I got here from your comment on She Likes Purple's column about finances. I am so, so sorry to hear about your loss. I'll say a prayer for you and Roger tonight.

I'm glad you have good friends like Chris and Merlyn to sit with you.

Hugs to you babe. Big ones.

I'm so sorry, Jes. *hugs*

I am so, so very sorry. Thank you for having the courage and the grace to share this with us.

Hey... so sorry. i just read about this. I miscarried last year at this time as well but didn't really tell anyone. If you ever want to talk, let me know.