Certain to Get an Uprise out of Pantene Users Everywhere
March 08, 2007
More than two years ago, I showed up on the doorstep of a stylist for our first date together. Our first and our last date together. So really, it was just one appointment and then I migrated on with my fickle ways.
She was a hippie working in an upscale salon, and she loved talking about her life as a vegan. Before meeting her, I had never realized that not only do vegans not EAT meat, they don't use products that have been near meat.
Or, something like that. I really don't remember much from our meeting at all, other than the fact that it had been nearly three years since I had cut my hair. Y'all: Three years.
My locks were pretty stringy, and unkempt, and dryyyyy. Gah – did I mention the dryness?
You people who know me? Who have spent time with me? How can you say you are my friend and allow me look the way I did, all string-y and brittle-ish? Was it so you would look that much better when standing next to me?
The hippie – let's call her Ember Rose – took one look at my hair and was all, "Guurrrrllll…[long pause]…Your hair is shameful." She spoke the truth, and I knew it. She asked me if I had been using Pantene*. And I was so surprised, because Yes! Isn't Pantene, like, what the popular kids use? Me, too! Me, too!!
After I gushed a little that during college I had finally made the switch from Suave to Pantene, Ember Rose explained to me that Pantene shampoo uses certain chemicals that strips each strand of hair and damages it, and then the gobs of wax in Pantene conditioner gloss back over the strands, giving them a nice coat of wax. That's why Pantene wants you to use them in conjunction with each other – its' a conspiracy! (?) She was so convincing that I totally bought into it. I had been using Pantene for many years, and my mane was stripped, stripped, stripped.
After she chopped off seven inches of the offending locks, she started with hair therapy and talked me through each step of what she did. Have I ever told you that I have a horrible memory? You see, I don't want to repeat myself, but I don't remember whether this subject has ever been addressed before.
If not, I should tell you now: I have a horrible memory. And: Gah. I cannot imagine how it will be when I am pregnant, because don't pregnant women have horrible memories, too? So when Roger comes home from work and I stare at him blankly, my hand gently resting on my protruding belly, it's not out of the question that I'll be thinking: "Who is this guy, again? And why does he have a key to my home?"
So. Anyway. My stylist was using several intensive treatments on my hair, trying to recondition it, though I couldn't tell you what those treatments were. That is when she introduced me to the Pureology hair care line.
And I have been in love ever since.
The End.
Pureology shampoo and conditioner is somewhat expensive, yes. It is my one splurge. (Okay, fine. And also my foundation, and powder, and blush and mascara and lip gloss. But that's it. Promise.)
(And besides, a girl's gotta do what she can to look good, right? I mean, particularly if she doesn't exercise. Personally, I wear lots of glitter on my face to distract from my thighs.)
(Because if you're gawking at all my sparkle and shine, chances are you won't notice the two redwoods that support my torso.)
I've said it before and I'll say it again: it is proven that people with tendrils curly hair (me!) should only wash their hair once every few days. Something about curly hair needing to stay moisturized and hydrated, blah blah blah. With Pantene, I had to wash my locks EVERY DAY because otherwise they would closely resemble fast food fries – you know: the kind that, when wrung, droplets of grease splatter about?
And do you know why Pantene does that? Oh, believe me. I'll tell you why.
Pureology is 100% vegan. It contains no chemicals. It doesn't strip my hair and then add wax like Pantene does. The natural oils produced by my body are being re-absorbed into my hair and scalp, which means I only have to wash my hair only every three or four days. With Pantene, those oils were sitting on top of my wax-covered coiffure like a layer of oil on a tarmac.
If I don't remember any one thing for the rest of my life (or at least during pregnancy, but I think I'm okay, since I currently have a two-year supply of Pureology at home), I hope I'll always recall what Ember Rose taught me: Pantene sucks.
* Ha, sidenote: I just typed "cheap shampoo" into Google Search, and guess what the first Sponsored Link was? Pantene.
Comments
I like Pantene and since I don't have much hair I don't care.
~Jef
Posted by: Edge | March 8, 2007 12:43 PM
I, too, have curly hair and have done extensive product research throughout the years. Just recently I discovered this and I LOVE it. Sounds like it has some of the similar benefits to Pureology, without the hefty price tag... Check it out and compare. It smells GREAT.
Posted by: Lorie | March 8, 2007 12:55 PM
Uhhh Jes, it's me, the girl who has the hair you comment on all the time, the ridiculously shiny hair, that looks healthy and shiny and not at all greasy or dry, but just right
Oh and I use Pantene, have since high school and always will
Why? Cause people tell me my hair is pretty and shiny and like I'm gonna mess with that goldmine of a compliment generator
The end
Oh and don't think I didn't know where this was heading when I read the title and that you were probably thinking of me (and my shiny hair) when you wrote it
Posted by: Katie | March 8, 2007 01:14 PM
Jef: You have a point. Shampoo doesn't matter for boys. Or girls with really, really short hair.
Lorie: Thanks for the recommendation - I'll check it out!
Katie: But think of how HEALTHIER AND SHINIER it could be. Also? That shine? May be the by-product of wax. Just sayin'.
Also, for the record, I wasn't thinking of you when I wrote this. I was thinking of another friend of mine, Willow, a friend since high school, who used Pantene in high school and I think she still does. She has ridiculously shiny hair, too.
But I still hate Pantene.
Posted by: jes | March 8, 2007 01:21 PM
I'm with Katie. I may not be perfect, but I have great hair that generates lots of compliments (even if it won't hold a curl for 5 minutes no matter what kind of supersonic hair product I use!) Pantene all the way baby. I'll quit using it when it quits working for me. My hairstylist even tells me, "well, I normally don't advocate grocery store hair products, but every time I see someone with great hair who don't buy the fancy stuff, it's always Pantene that they use."
Posted by: Laura | March 8, 2007 01:23 PM
Hmmm maybe Patene is just bad for the curly haired persons
Posted by: Katie | March 8, 2007 01:26 PM
I use Suave. I have one child with exceedingly curly hair. She uses Suave. We use Suave cream rinse every 3rd or 4th day when we wash her hair. Her head glows with the glowness of a thousand glowing moons.
I have the equivalent of 1/4 cup of hair on my head, so it doesn't matter for me.
BUT ... I love good makeup ... I'll have to check their makeup line.
Posted by: OMSH | March 8, 2007 01:39 PM
I remember like 7 or 8 years ago all these stories about Pantene and how it's not that much better than Suave -- just more expensive. And I was always told that if you looked at a bottle of Pantene and a bottle of wax, there was only one ingredient that was different. I haven't heard much good about Pantene.
I really love Biolage and Rusk. I use Biolage shampoo and Rusk conditioner and leave-in conditioner. They're awesome. And Ulta has great sales where you can get a one-liter bottle for like $13. (I think the sale is going on right now, actually.)
Curly hair does dry out quicker than other hair, so I wash mine every other day. Then, I use heavy-duty conditioner and leave-in conditioner. I also get a bajillion compliments on my hair.
I'm with you, Jes.
Posted by: my life is brilliant | March 8, 2007 02:43 PM
Damn. I just bought a bottle of Pantene, too. I usually buy Garnier Fructise, but there was some un-moving beeyotch in the way so I just grabbed the Pantene. Darn it!
Posted by: Karly | March 8, 2007 04:16 PM
I'm with Jes. Although, my mother has been using Pantene for years and years and how beatiful shiny hair (that could also be due to the semi-permanent color she puts on it, too). But my stylists are always telling me not to use "grocery store" products, especially like Pantene, because it's like washing my hair with dish detergent. After awhile the message got to me and I only used salon products. Alot of my hair problems had to do with many years of highlighting it. Finally the highlights are grown out and I am natural and color free. My hair is now wavy wavy frizzy frizzy and I constantly battle the frizz, no matter what product I use. I have lately been using natural products from a health food store that are free of parabens and sodium laureth sulfate and sodium laryl suflate. They are baddies!
Posted by: Chiada | March 8, 2007 05:43 PM
I use Pantene sometimes, and it doesn't make my hair blindingly brilliant or anything, but it works ok. I do prefer, on the cheapo end of the shampoo spectrum, the Herbal Essences Drama Clean shampoo and conditioner. That stuff smells good and gets my hair nice and clean but without making it all brittle.
I actually have not found a more expensive shampoo that I like -- oddly enough, Aveda's Shampure makes my hair very strawlike. No likey.
Posted by: Lawyerish | March 8, 2007 05:59 PM
LOVE YOU. I've heard about Pantene doing that. I have a small bottle of hairspray but I don't use anything Pantene as a general rule. If I'm in the mood to spend money I like Pureology and Kerastase. Right now I use Dove. But yeah, vegan. I want to try to make the switch from veg to vegan, but I don't know. I might be gluten intolerant and wouldn't my being vegan AND gluten intolerant just make me macrobiotic? My life sucks.
Posted by: Jurgen Nation | March 8, 2007 07:36 PM
I think the more likely train of thought might be:
"OOoh, he's cute. I'd sure love to have his ba... [looking down] eh what?"
Posted by: mike | March 9, 2007 07:22 AM
As a balding man I can only hint at the joy of being able to just use Ivory bar soap on my noggin and what little hair attempts to stand it's ground. It's the one positive thing about losing your hair. :)
Posted by: Joe | March 9, 2007 09:16 AM
Seriously, there must be a Pantene chapter in the cosmetology textbook, because every stylist I've ever known has said those exact same things about it. I've never tried it, myself--I'm afraid to!
Posted by: lizgwiz | March 9, 2007 09:19 AM
!!! My hairdresser told me the SAME THING about how absolutely horrible Pantene is !!!
I had been using it FOREVER. I stopped and viola! My hair got better. Not great - b/c I still hate it with an intense burning passion... but it's better.
Boo Pantene.
Posted by: Courtney | March 9, 2007 05:50 PM
I used Pantene through high school and college, and for the last 6 or 7 years I have been using Catwalk shampoo. Unfortunately, I think it's time for a switch again, as my hair has been noticeably blah-er. But since it's straight as a board, Pureology might not be the answer. (sigh) I hate spending this much time thinking about my hair.
Posted by: dionna | March 10, 2007 12:24 PM
I stopped using Pantene because it was so horribly built up on my scalp. And plus? They changed the fragrance about 9 years ago and I haven't really liked it since then. I used it back when it was in those cool small bottles with gold caps. Or am I the only one old enough to remember that far back?
My stylist is always telling me about these great products for crazy curly heads like myself, but I just CANNOT FATHOM spending $20 per bottle (or more) on several bottles of goo.
I love to have fab hair. I do! But I just can't spend money on that kind of goop. Not when I can have "pretty durn nice" hair at a tiny fraction of the price.
But I will check out that kind that someone mentioned from Wal Greens.
Posted by: Jayleigh | March 10, 2007 07:59 PM
OMG, that is me!!! I lost alot of my hair a few years back after having been very sick and having had to take alot of toxic medications. Now, my hair is growing back. I have curly hair and I wash daily with Pantene. My hair is the same as you described. Will have to see if they sell the brand you are using here in Australia :)
Posted by: Cazzie | March 12, 2007 02:25 AM
I'm with you on Purology - love that stuff. I used the antifade variety and it really helps keep the color in my hair longer. You know, gotta keep those grays covered as long as possible. I didn't know it was vegan though - interesting. I'm sure that helps explain the high price tag. But, I've found a little drop goes a long way and the bottle lasts surprisingly long.
Posted by: Julie | March 12, 2007 11:07 AM
I'm sooo with you. One of the BAD ingredients is any type of sulfate. Sulfates make shampoo very foamy, but they strip your hair (most of the salon brands have it too) BUT not Pureology! woot!
I also found a brand at the natural foods store J/A/S/O/N that just came out with some "salon" products that are like $6 a bottle and with NO SULFATES. :)
Posted by: Aimee | March 12, 2007 03:18 PM
I hate Pantene because of the smell. Urg, that old-lady smell bites me in the nose.
But I use whatever is cheap. And my hair is fabulous. I thank my dad's fab genetics. He only went grey at 75 and washed his hair with Ivory bar soap every day and looked just great his whole life.
Posted by: Suebob | March 13, 2007 12:32 PM
I think I had been told about Pantene being horrible for your hair ... and after several years of obstinate use anyway, I finally kicked the habit. Now I use SunSilk and LOVE LOVE it! I have very thick, curly/wavy hair and it does a wonderful job at defrizzing.
See, hippies are good for SOME things!
Posted by: Em | March 14, 2007 05:25 PM
Tell it girl!! If you didn't know there's proof that these products lead to hair loss. So when all you idiots who hated on this post wake up one day with problems you'll remember that you read this and you should've listened. Your body is a like a sponge. Feed it good and it'll treat you good. Feed it chemicals and you'll deteriorate slowly. TRUTH!
Why do you think you see so many seniors taking RX....HELLO!!!!
Posted by: kel | March 23, 2007 05:35 PM