Chirky

A couple weeks ago I signed up to help review blogs for NaBloPoMo. I’m looking at a list of fifty two blogs that begin with the letter “O” and, y’all? I’m a little overwhelmed.

I am horrible (horrible!) at math, and yet I am supposed to give you statistics. I cannot promise they are accurate, because the calculations involved me staring at my calculator, and then the numbers, and then the calculator, and then punching numbers, and then wondering if they were correct. And then I do the Dolly Parton calculation just to make sure the calculator is right.

Incidentally, that is also how I took the SAT in high school.

Except I didn’t have a gross boy sitting two seats away at the cafeteria table, BREATHING HEAVILY out loud in a very noisy way. With heaving.

STATS*:
52 blogs
(uhh?? How do you do stats? Am I supposed to divide something somewhere? Maybe?)
36% were mommyblogs
52% are already out of the running (missed one or more posts before November 24th)
12% I labeled “boooorrrrrriiiinnggggg.”

*I have no idea if these stats are accurate. They're just...what my calculator produced. Totally by user error. And maybe some tequila.

However, I did find several worth introducing:

(OFTEN) PEDANTIC MUSINGS
This girl is fun, feisty, and opinionated. I enjoyed reading her entries and added her to my personal “favorites” list so I can remember to go back for more.

OH FOR FUN!
The thing she does with googly eyes makes me laugh. And laugh. And laugh. And I think I may go out and buy googly eyes for my own food, because it doesn’t seem fair somehow that all my edibles are without eyeballs.

ONE CHILD LEFT BEHIND
An entertaining writer, some of which I don’t even understand (which doesn’t make his writing any less entertaining). Perhaps even more entertaining than his entries is the Laudy Daw section of his site, under which he lists what others have said about him and his writing. Apparently, people are very opinionated: "I would rather suck a tape worm from your urethra than read this crap." Ha! That’s funny.

OROONI
I had so much fun reading this site, probably because this girl (guy? I don’t know – there wasn’t an “about” section, even though the subtitle is “she does stuff” but – who is she? The author? The dog? It’s a mystery.) is drama, the perfect self-deprecating and sarcastic and judgmental flair for drama, and from the little bit I’ve read, I already know that I’ll totally be going back for more. I almost feel like I shouldn’t highlight her (him?) in this NaBloPoMo review because she (he?) missed one day of posting and is therefore disqualified, but: she’s (he’s?) funny! The good thing about being this category reviewer is that I get to do whatever I want, and you can’t do anything about it.

OTHER SIDE OF MY HEAD
The funny (not hee-haw funny, and not ironic funny, but more like interesting funny) thing about being a category reviewer for NaBloPoMo is that people find out that you’re reviewing categories, and then they start commenting on your blog, and you think their comments are funny, so you go back and visit theirs.

And then you realize: CRAP! This is a blog that I’m supposed to review – it’s totally scandalous when a judge (moi?) and a beauty pageant contestant have an affair, and then people wonder whether the outcome is rigged because the judge votes for his mistress, or in this case, the blog reviewer highlights one of her readers.

Or, it could be entirely coincidental that Kir (the author) started reading my blog. Either way, the former reasoning it totally more appealing, right? A scandal! Right here on chirky.com!