Chirky

OK, so I totally used to be like this. Now, I kind of hide them but I don't freak at the checkout anymore.

Also, you should just carry your underwear on. i do. I decided underwear is an investment (the cute stuff anyway) and that they are going to touch it all... and I know people who have had their stolen (ewww)... so... I just carry mine on!

Oh and PS saves me from worrying about it getting lost. Because my God, Jordanian underwear all SUCKS ASS. It's totally weird and like wearing public restroom brown paper towels. yeah, you know what I am talking about. They are the most not-comfortable paper products.

Well, my husband has never had to buy any feminine products for me until after I had Isabella and he had to go buy GIANT PADS. I write that in bold letters because there's no getting around the fact that the box contains GIANT PADS.

Anywho...he too bought lots of other things to help ease the discomfort of such a purchase. Then upon returning and very proud of himself for going through with the dastardly deed, we discovered he'd stolen them. Yep. Hidden them so well that even he didn't see that they didn't get scanned. HA!

Wonder if I should be evil and request a store run with this baby too.

Oh, man. For YEARS I could not buy feminine products for myself. In college, my mom would send them to me in care packages. When I did have to purchase them myself, I would go to the remotest possible store and skulk about until I was certain no other students were in the vicinity and then RUSH to the cash register.

I am FINALLY over it; even so, I buy Tampax on Drugstore.com whenever possible. Because I will buy anything online to save myself a trip to any store. Especially those.

I SO feel your pain. I had to make my husband stop at a convenience store so I could get some because I'm the WORST about remembering to bring them when I need 'em. This place had them LOCKED AWAY. I had to ask the (male) store clerk, turn bright red, awkwardly say, "man, y'all should get a better system, because THIS? Is mortifying!", and THEN have a sketchy guy tell me "it's NATURAL!" Shudder!

This is terrible, but I will confess: I laughed at you through reading this. Not with you, but at you. Just like when your girlfriends are together and they're going, "Oh, you silly girl. What are you THINKING?"

Because you are just. too. cute.

You sound like my husband. He is SOOO embarassed if I buy "feminine products." It cracks me up. I like to announce, "Hold on, I have to go get some TAMPONS," and then laugh as he dies of embarassment. I am mean.

I, like you, cannot buy tampons, pads, or a pregnancy test without buying something else. But the pregnancy test is always the worst.

To make things worse, usually when I need a pregnancy test it's just out of the blue and I don't need to buy anything else. So then I go to the Wal*mart that has the self-checkout (instead of the one that doesn't), walk very quickly in, briskly pass by the pregnancy test section, grab one, high tail it to the checkout and get the heck out of there. And of course, the store I go to is WAY out of my way home. But for some reason (eventhough I'm married and shouldn't be ashamed) I feel dirty when I buy a box of tests. It's weird.

Obviously the chocolate was a need. Because if you needed the tampons then you definitely needed the chocolate.

I have no issue buying any of those things. I bought condoms in high school as a joke gift for a friend and everyone was amazed that I did it. At our local drugstore where I'd known the pharmacist my whole life, no less.

I've even made my brother buy tampons when I've sent him to the store just so he would get over any embarrassment he might still have. (Having 4 older sisters, there's not a lot left.)

I'm always amazed when you find a restroom that has dispensers in them anymore. If they do have them they usually carry condoms and lip gloss.

I am the same way. I WILL NOT purchase feminine care items alone. Heaven help me if I am in Super Wal Mart getting them. I end up with an entire cart full.

Awesome post. I love that you took a photo!

I feel the same way! It can blow up in your face, however. I once found myself at the scanner with a box of Kotex, a bottle of wine and, I kid you not, some candles that I fancied whilst strolling and looking at things. I realilzed with horror what it looked like only when I got to the checker. I mumbled a "heh heh, it's gonna be a fun night." I fled.

I've gotten better at buying Tampons over the years...but I still refuse to buy condoms. Hehe. Even saying the word makes me blush.

Once I bought 3 BIG boxes of tampons because they were on clearance at Target. Not sure what possessed by, except for the little red sticker and the marked down price.

HA Ha HA! Yeah, I normally look for the girl checker if I'm buying them. Nothing like putting a box of Super Plus' on the conveyor belt for the 17 year old guy.

I think Brian bought them for me ONE time. In 10 years. It killed him.

The worst is buying condoms. Especially when you forgot your wedding ring. And especially b/c the economy size was on sale so you've got the mega pack in your shopping cart. My Kroger has them behind lock and key. I refuse to ask the pharmacist to open it.

These comments are hilarious.

I am Suebob hear me roar. I buy feminine products BY THEMSELVES and say "I don't need a bag!!!" Yep. Carry them out in plain sight. I feel as bad as Dirty Harry, swagggering.

Hmmm, never bothered me buying them for any of my girlfriends or my wife. Condoms were harder to buy. 99% of women have a period. What percentage of people do you think are having sex? Well, probably less. And if you're a guy buying condoms, you look arrogant, if you're a woman, you look slutty. The privates do us in, don't they?

~Jef

Tampons are nothing compared to condoms! Wait, I take that back. Standing in the aisle and looking for what condoms you want/need is WAY worse than actually purchasing them.

And what is up with everyone needing to be in that aisle the SECOND I stop to look???

HaHa. I need to start a blog called, "Reasons I am thankful that I am a man." And this would definitely be on that list. It is problematic enough being as big as I am and having to use the bathroom to pee on an airplane. I don't like using public restrooms period (pun intended) and I certainly would not want to have to deal with an issue like the aforementioned one since being at the airport is stressful enough!

oh the dreaded deed of purchasing the needed products at uncomfortable times, my fav story was rationing these products (along with toilet paper) on a hiking trip (three girls, two of whom came unprepared, and no stores on a mountain) and then when in haiti on a mission trip and having to explain to our host (who spoke broken english) that we needed "feminine products", that was a funny conversation

ahhhh the joys of being a girl

Two thoughts:

1) I am surprised that you don't put padlocks on your ziplock bags just to make it difficult for those searching your luggage to put their grubby hands on your underwear...

2) I am like this with condoms. I HATE buying condoms. I throw a whole bunch of crap in the cart to make it look like I hap-hazardly walked down the contraceptive isle and "remembered" that I needed condoms... and then when I am checking out, I hand them to the cashier with my left hand so it is obvious that I am married and that it is really okay for me to be buying these... I buy the Package that has about 200 of those freakin' things in them so that I can reduce the number of times I have to go through this experience. Thank goodness for Self check out... the embarassment of the whole purchasing condom routine is enough to make getting fixed worth it. Finally, a quick side story, Sydney was in her home town grocery store buying condoms and the cashier had to do a price check. HA! So glad I wasn't the one buying them that time.

Anyway, this comment goes back and forth numerous times over that line we are not supposed to cross... but oh well.

P.S. I purchase femine products all the time for Sydney... because, everyone knows that I am just helping my wife out... Actually, I always get these looks of approval from women because they are thinking to themselves... "WHAT a nice guy... I wish my husband would purchase femine products for me." Major points and I am cool for the moment... that is if buying femine products could even make you cool.

Eddie... this could be an item in your "marry me" blog.

I buy feminine products without embarrassment now, probably because growing up, I was SO HORRIFIED BY THE WHOLE IDEA of a period, not just the accompanying products, that I nearly fainted and never bought them until it was nearly too late, which added stress.

Now I buy tampons in giant, hulking containers at Costco.

really must i hear stories of all you married types buying condoms in BULK? People I know in person, now I know that somewhere in your house is lurking this mammouth container of condoms. Great, now that is all I'll be thinking about at the next gamenight "where is the large box of condoms that all my friends own?"

Ha, ha, ha, ha. I don't need them anymore. I so don't miss my period. All the mess, the hormones out of control, the craving for chocolate. I used to be embarrased when I was younger about buying tampons, but when I got older, I didn't care.

We used to paly a game in college called "and a box of condoms." We tried to think of the craziest thing you could buy with a box of condoms to get a reastion out of the cashier. I think the final compiled list was:
a weedeater
a desk calendar
a happy mother's day greeting card
a bag of doritos
5 boxes of jello
a jar of peanut butter
a pregnacy test
and a box of condoms

One night my best friend, her boyfriend and I were all hanging out at my boyfriends house. We sent the boys to the store- they, being guys didnt pay too much attention, just wandering around getting the things we asked for and apparently things they also needed/wanted. They walked up to the cashier together and realized all they had was camera film, natural fruit juice popsicles and condoms. The cashier was about die laughing from how embarassed they were.

How funny! Buying condoms bothers some while it doesn't to purchase tampons and vice versa.

In such a sexually explicit world, you'd think we'd all be a little more comfortable with the happenings of our nether regions :)

I don't have any issues with buying tampons or condoms, but buying something like Monistat? So embarassing.

Mrs. CPA: I did get a comment from a clerk once when I bought, among other things, a box of condoms and a cat toy. It was one of those flexible plastic wands with feathers and a bell on the end. I was just picking up things we needed at the store, but the cat toy and the condoms ended up together on the conveyor belt. I was very surprised when the clerk said something.

I also had this experience at an airport, but you know what? I didn't even care that it was a male clerk and a male-dominated line. It was an airport, and I was leaving the country.

Completely different in the local drugstore, where my grandmother's friends are waiting for the prescriptions at the checkout counter.

For some reason, it doesn't bother me anymore to buy tampons. In fact, one time in college, I was heading toward them when I noticed this guy seriously checking me out. I marched boldly up to them and grabbed a box of 40 super-absorbent tampons. I looked at him like, "Still interested NOW?!"

I thought it was funny. I'm pretty sure I'd rather run through Wal-Mart naked than buy condoms there. I'm pretty sure I'd die of embarrassment.

I'm with Suebob, I will buy tampons or condoms. I will stand tall and proud. And I usually try to pair the tampons with ice cream for added effect. (no one will talk to you while you're in line because they are scared)

Condoms paired with lube is the best. Everyone else gets red and flushed while I stand their like a stoic.

Ha, ha!!

I'm with Mocha - you silly girl! Get over it!!! They're just tampons!

Now condoms - WHOLE OTHER STORY! I've bought exactly ONE BOX in my life (ribbed for my pleasure even!). And I only bought them because when Kyle found out that I had NEVER purchased condoms he decided we just couldn't have that. Thank Goodness I'm on the pill... if I never buy condoms again it'll be too soon!

OMG! Suebob is my new hero! I hate buying both but sometimes it's "buy or die" right? Eeew, I don't even like talking about it. (Yeah, I guess I've got some issues, don't I?)

Great post, Jes. And the comments? They're too much fun.

Awwww, K-T. Why do I feel like your comment was directed at me?

Don't worry, I'll keep them under lock and key.

Found you thanks to Zoot, and I'm glad I did. This post is cracking me up, as are all of the comments. I've never had to buy condoms in my life (no never, thank God) and I hope I never will. Because I would have to throw about ten other things in my basket to "disguise" my purchase, and even then I don't know if I could go through with it.

I don't have a problem buying tampons. Oh, unless the cashier is a teenage boy, in which case I die of embarrasment right there on the spot.

I have no problem buying pads or tampons. Matt (my husband) has no problem buying me pads or tampons. Meanwhile I have the hardest time buying condoms... I'm MARRIED... and yet ashamed. I'm not quite sure why I find condoms to be so... bad, but I practically run as I'm grabbing them.