Chirky

It really isn't that bad. People divide up into two groups, those that drink like fish and make fools of themselves and the responsible ones. It would have been really great to have gone with a spouse, but I wasn't married at the time. People mellow and I can't say that it's all a lot of fun, but it's nice to see people you haven't seen in a while. But only once every 5-10 years.

~Jef

My ten year reunion happened three years ago. Fortunately, I was on my honeymoon at the time, so I couldn't be there. I really had zero desire to go anyway. Not because I harbor any resentment or judgment/counter-judgment toward those people, but because I just don't care about the whole thing and I am quite sure none of my classmates - except for the three I remain in touch with, one of whom is and will always be my best friend - care at all about me or what I'm doing. I had a sucky time in high school for lots of reasons, but it's over. Most of my classmates never knew who I really was; they didn't care to know. I got far, far away from there as soon as I could.

And in the same way that people used to give me that "Huh?" look when I told them that I just spent the summer at a ballet program in Boston, they would now be all "Whatever" at the revelation that I'm a lawyer in New York. It's not something that is important or impressive to any of them, and it's not like it's all that out of character for me. Frankly, all they would care about, if anything, is whether I - the biggest dork in school, the ugly one - managed to get myself married.

A classmate of mine who also left our hometown but who remains in touch with the "popular" people told me before the reunion that she wished I could go, so that I could show everyone how I had changed; how I was attractive and fun and confident and successful now. And I just didn't care to do that. Because no matter what I am now, I know that when people look at me, they won't see who I really am, if they even see me at all.

I didn't go to my 10 year reunion and don't regret it a bit. High school was okay, but certainly not worth revisiting. Very true what Lawyerish says...people will probably still see you for who they remember you are and not who you truly are, if they ever bothered to see the true you even in HS.

Besides, I get all the gossip from my mom about those I went to HS with and I have to say, I'm glad I'm me and not them!

My high school class was made up of 29 people. Many of them I still know and love today. Chris Wilson and I even went to High School together and then were both leaders for a long time.

I loved a good number of my high school friends, but there were the ones that I hated as well. The ones that seemed to seek me out to make my life a living hell. To this day I still get made fun of for having a high voice, but the difference is, now I realize that those people needed me. They needed me to feel better about themselves. They needed someone to put down the same way that the poor ignorant white people needed to have slaves so that they could be better than someone else.

Now when someone makes fun of me for any reason at all, I take it as a compliment. In their effort to belittle me they have made me superior in more ways than one.

Life is one big game and the cool thing is, if you play it with your rules you always come out the winner.

Yeah, high school pretty much sucked. There's something about how the way some of the kids can make you feel in high school ... I can't imagine that you were ever one of those people in high school. From reading your blog, you seem like an awesome person with a great sense of humor who's too considerate to make people feel that way.

You're not alone in feeling the way you do about those people. I can understand what you mean about feeling bad about it, but it doesn't make you a bad person. It's understandable to not want to feel that way again -- and to want to avoid being around people like that.

I'm sure, though, that being there will be different. If you cross paths with one of them at the reunion and carry on a conversation, if the person seems to be the same as in high school, you can politely move on and be the bigger person.

In the same boat as you, looking at my ten year looming in October. For me it's more of a "what the heck have I been doing in the last ten years?" feeling than a dreading of seeing the people I went to high school with. I like high school, I liked the people from my high school, so I'm not dreading the return but Jes I see your point and your fear might be starting to rub off on me. Stop that.

I'm sorta, kinda looking forward to mine. I went to a teeny, tiny, all-girls school north of Baltimore, Maryland. BEAU-TEE-FUL part of the country. The school is in the middle of nowhere, which means that it is one of those peaceful places with rolling hills, white fences, and horses hanging out in green pastures. I was a member of the largest class in the history of the school (a whooping 54), so it was literately impossible not to know everyone. It was also a boarding school, so people had a tendency to "get along" (if for no other reason then we all had to see each other ALL. THE. TIME). Mostly, there was just a lot of drama and people mainly separated themselves by grade level, if at all. It was fun, although – that said – I never want to live in a dorm/house/whatever with 30 other women again EVER AGAIN.

It was also not uncommon for people to be friends (really friends) with their teachers and dorm parents. I guess when you are so far from home (and only 14 years old), you are drawn to families. One of my teachers essentially adopted a bunch of us, and we all still keep in touch (in fact, her daughter graduates from high school next May and several of us were on the phone over the weekend making plans to attend the ceremony).

I don’t think I would have survived in the public school system. I mean, I was in the public schools up until I left for boarding school, but I never really fit in. I was “bookish” and had no desire to be a cheerleader, which instantly exiled me (I was one of three girls in the ENTIRE class that wasn’t a cheerleader in 8th grade. One of the other girls was in special education, and Kelly, who I’m actually friends with today, was a midyear transfer student). I, however, did want to try-out for the boy’s football team, and remember being told that “girls just don’t play football with the boys” by my PE coach at the time. This is probably the reason why I elected to play rugby in college…

My 10-year was 6 years ago and I have to say it was more fun than I thought it would be. I ended up tracking down everyone and planning most of it, so I knew what everyone would be like.

You will have the girls who are still too snooty to belittle themselves to speak to anyone they deem below themselves. You will have the guys who think their crap don't stink. But mostly you will have people just happy to see each other and want to say hey.

Friday night we did an alumni only night at the local watering hole. It was a blast. Most everyone was completely cool, you intermixed with everyone, had some drinks and caught up. Saturday night was like homecoming revisited. Dates were invited, we had a buffet and tables were set up. You sat with the people you still talked to and there wasn't a lot of intermingling. We had a DJ but almost no one danced. A huge group went to a bar afterwards and that was more fun.

When I was planning the whole thing, my dad's friend said to me, "Your 10 year will be your most pretentious. Your 20 year will be more relaxed. Your 30th, you have a blast and at your 40th you're just so happy anyone else is still alive."

I knew people who didn't come to the reunion, for various reasons. They hated high school and everyone one involved with it, they're gay and didn't want to out themselves or deal with people's reactions, they felt they had moved on with their lives and didn't need anything from the past.

I think it's all in the attitude you have and how you're feeling about yourself. If you're happy with who you are and where you are in your life, nothing those people say can take that away from you.

If you truly think you're going to hate it, then don't go. There's no reason to cause yourself pain and heartache. But if you think you'd like to see some old acquaintances and find out what eveyone has been up to, then just go and plan on enjoying yourself.

I think I'm grateful that there's almost no chance of my class ever having a high school reunion.

That said - it might be fun; you get to revert to childhood for a night and sit with your old friends and make fun of the same old things. Or it might be not be fun, since I don't really remember high school as fun.

Hmm...I had a class of 25, and we didn't even have a 10 year! Ha! I guess we all felt the same way about high school. I moved 300 miles away and that wasn't far enough, so I went another 900. I've recently gotten in touch with a few people that I've enjoyed re-connecting with, and that's been enough. High school really is overrated.

My 10 year was 2 years ago (gasp!). Really, I enjoyed it. I went to a small private (Christian) school, so for the most part, everyone was pretty decent. And since there were 64 in my senior class, we all knew each other pretty well. A lot of us started kindergarten together, in fact.

I made it a point to talk to just about everyone. That's pretty much how it was in high school too. Friends with everyone, but not really close friends with any.

Friday night we ate Don Pablo's catering at the football game. Sat. night we rented a room at Dave & Buster's. It was funny to see how the same groups of people ate at the same tables. It was as if High School was last week and we were still at our lunch tables or something. Nothing had really changed. Sad, really.

It was definitely worth going to though. Hope you enjoy yours.

I didn't go to my class reunion. Had no desire. I have moved on and completely happy with who I have become.

Wow, everyone has a lot to say on this subject!

I went to my 10-year ten days ago (Woo! Class of 96!) and I think it's all still soaking in. In some ways, everyone is still the same. In other ways, everyone is different...they're more...who they're supposed to be. Just like I feel that I'm more "ME" now than in high school. Or I'm perceived more accurately now than I was in high school. Make sense?

I dunno. I wrote my pre-reunion thoughts; I'm still working on the post-reunion thoughts.

I hope you go. I hope you are nice to everyone and have a great time. And, for the love, I hope you (and the planning committee) do a little better on the hospitality front than my peeps did. I mean, if you're going to hold the event outside in a tent (on a day that turned out to be 55 degrees), that's information you should really include ON THE INVITATION.

I didn't go to mine, as I was in Phoenix on a business trip. I would have, I think, had I been around, seriously.

I hated high school, too. I mean, HATED. I was, um, in the band, so you can imagine how cool I was. A good friend of mine went, and gave me a funny report - apparently all of the 'cool' girls, you know, the snooty ones who made you feel shitty about yourself, were walking around apologizing and saying things like, "Was I an asshole in high school? It's just because I'm shy!"

And of course, I then wished I'd been there because: I call bullshit.

Didn't go to mine.... really I did want people comparing me to anyone else. I am who I am and I just honestly haven't stayed in contact with anyone. I would maybe want to see about 5 people that I would love to touch base with but that is about it.

Next year, it will be fifteen years since I graduated. I didn't go to my ten year reunion, since I figured I hadn't done enough to impress anyone.

I also had such a hard time with those people, though I had lots of friends and was well-liked and affable. Inside, I always wondered how they could BE that way. But I never said anything.

Those were bad reasons not to go. Grown up me could have been so much more real, and seen so much more of what was going on behind their personalities and actions. I would have been able to forgive and move on.

But I was chicken. I'm glad you're not.

I went to my 10 year high school reunion. It was fun to see the same snooty ones hanging around and acting that way. I talked with everyone and had a great time. There were a bunch of us there.

At my 25 year one, there weren't as many of us there. And we were a little more relaxed. The President of our class had a nice talk. He was so cute and still is.

The 40 year one will be interesting to see who is still around.

We all have that person and are all that person to another.
I dont recall very many 'bad times' in High School....I think I remember the good stuff cause it was more prevalent and more memorable in general.
I loved drill team, speech and debate (until the last half of senior year which would be the only thing/person holding me back from going to the reunion). I loved class and the people I knew and socialized with. The ones who did not care for me (im sure there are many) really did not bother me as I did not care for them either.
High School was so superficial and once I realized that, I had a much better time.
I may be fooling myself but I really cant wait for the reunion (same one as Jes).
The only thing I dread is telling anyone who asks that I did not finish college and am currently a single, divorced mother of 1. The upside of all that downside??? In spite of not finishing college, I have a very stable job with a great future and found the strenght to get myself and my amazing son out of a dangerous situation.
All in all, I feel good about who I am and where I have gotten in the last 10 years....

I didn't make it to my ten-year reunion, but my fifteen-year reunion was last summer. I truly had a good time (and I was all about screaming "Go to hell!" too). You never know.

Jess! I am so beside myself because I had no idea you felt that way about T-town. If I was ever one of those people to you, I apologize profusely. Though, when memories of our friendship come to mind, I hope you (like me) think back to OM and building stuff in your parents garage, StuCo and trips to Austin w/ Mrs. Oats, and your beautiful wonderful laugh that made everyone else laugh too! If anyone gives you looks at the reunion, let me know. I will revert back to my bully days and take care of business for ya! I cannot wait to go back to our reunion and I will make it my mission to get you onboard! I think it will be so much fun and hopefully some of the not so nice people will have grown up a little. For the one's that haven't, too bad for them. I won't be losing any sleep over it! And Willow...if you read this...finishing/not finishing school - it's not the most important thing in the world. You're a good mother and a great person (I am sure!) - and that's something that many college graduates are never able to achieve!