Philippines: Manila.
February 27, 2006
It has taken me much too long to tell you about our time in the Philippines, and for that I must apologize, though I am sure you can guess that it was rosy and beautiful and filled with laughter and hand-holding and crossing dangerous three-lane roads that had become five-lanes and praying for our lives each time we climbed inside a taxi. We dodged cute little 3-year-old girls who were begging for money on the street, because after the first time we gave them coins they latched onto us Americanos and followed us for three blocks before finally turning around. And by 'following us' I mean they were attached to our legs and were chanting something that I can only guess was Tagalog for "Will you buy some flowers?" or something, with little bits of English and "need food" and "money for school" mixed in.
Whew.
So, in Manila we stayed at the Mandarin Oriental, now known by us as That Overpriced Hotel and That Hotel That Exploited Foreigners. Because they wanted to charge us $14 per hour to use the Internet, not to mention what we shelled out for the room itself. Internet, do you KNOW how much money I spent on you while I was in Manila? They wanted to charge us $4 to wash ONE pair of underwear - and believe me, I had more than one pair to wash. Plus, the food from the hotel restaurant wasn't that great. And if you know me by now, you know that I believe that food can make or break a vacation.
That's why we shouted with glee when we discovered a) a full-service laundromat across the street that would wash ALL our clothes for $5 and b) an internet cafe that charged only $1 per hour.
Just like my mom, I'm such the bargain hunter. Locale makes no difference.
Admittedly, I kind of wanted to stick stick the laundromat owner in my pocket and carry her around with me if only because her prices were so reasonable! And those Filipinos - they're TOTALLY small enough to fit in my pocket. Among them, I was like an Amazon woman. Barbaric, really.
You know how people in the U.S. go to a convenience store or a grocery store or some other sort of store to buy everyday items? Like cigarettes and newspapers and flyswatters and plastic helicopters? In the Philippines, the store is portable. It just walks up and down the busy streets and sells its goods to people stuck in traffic. And no one gets hurt or run over! I simply cannot imagine this occurring in Dallas, though I do think it would be very handy when I'm stuck in afternoon traffic and craving a snack-size pack of Oreos.
Manila, like many cities, is a dichotomy of the ungodly wealthy and extremely poor. Our last morning in Manila we ate breakfast in the same restaurant as the former First Lady Imelda Marcos - just a few tables away. And, of course, there were several bodyguards who were TRYING to be inconspicuous. But I was TOTALLY onto them. Sort of. I mean, I knew she was someone important, it just didn't occur to me who she was until she had already left the restaurant. And after all that, I was most disappointed because I hadn't taken the time to notice her shoes.
Nearly everyday we saw different variations of the "squatter shacks" - homes built of aluminum and old billboards and rotting wood and anything else that would function as a wall or floor or roof. Sometimes they were built four-tall, all separate homes, and I couldn't figure out how in the world they actually got INTO the shacks, because there were no stairs! Was there a rope? I just don't know. Many housed 6 or more people each, and weren't much larger than my cubicle. My cubicle, with the built-in cushioned walls. And we ALL know what those cushioned walls are for.
The shacks don't have restrooms, or, as the Filipinos call them, "Comfort Rooms." I like this name, and particularly agree with my mother-in-law on why they are called CRs: Because once you are able to relieve yourself, you are once again so comfortable! Almost everywhere you turn - in the middle of business districts, just outside the mall, in a historic part of town, on the side of roads - all, mind you, in the public, in PLAIN VIEW OF ME, there were these signs:
It reads, "Don't pee here." I saw my fair share of peeing.
I guess if you don't have a comfort room in your home, and since public restrooms make you pay, it seems understandable that you go when you need to, where you need to. But where do you bathe?
Oh. On the sidewalk. And you brush your teeth there, too. Roger and I were driving by in a taxi (praying! for our lives!) when we saw these little boys, and my voice immediately rose two octaves as I squealed, "Roger! Roger! Hurry! Get a picture! I MUST have a picture of this! Roger! Hurry!" It wasn't that I was excited that they were relegated to bathing in the streets - quite the opposite. But I think the picture is beautiful, and human, and natural. They're just doing what they do everyday, regardless of who seems them. I wanted the image because I wanted to be reminded that not everyone lives as we do, where even the homeless in the United States are better off than the poor in third world countries.
To get around the cities, we mostly stuck to taxis. The entire time, I was itching to ride in a Jeepney. They're all over the place - in every city we visited. I think they must be the trademark of the Philippines. Sort of like McDonald's, of all places, is the trademark of the U.S.
Before arriving in-country, all I had ever heard about Jeepneys was the following:
1. Watch your purse, because pickpockets thrive on Jeepneys.
2. Jeepneys are notorious for stuffing too many people into too small of a space. Thus, it is not uncommon to see people hanging off the back of them as they speed down the road. Sidenote: I totally tried to do this on our truck when I was little, but my mom wouldn't let me. NOW you can understand why I wanted to ride on a Jeepney.
3. Because there are so many people, you have to "shimmy" as you sit down between people. Much like Elvis shimmied, but not on such a grand scale. You don't have to gyrate your pelvis.
4. They are brilliantly decorated, with mirrors and horns and murals of Jesus wearing sunglasses.
On our last night in Manila, or maybe it wasn't the last night - I was too frenetic to tell - we went to a cultural show. So much dancing! And the costumes! I wanted to watch them over and over again so I could video the performances and write down the choreography and then practice the dances in my living room.
During one of the more traditional folk dances, and I won't try to butcher the name lest I receive a phone call or hate mail remanding me for my lack of cultural sensitivity, though it had something to do with banging long pieces of dried bamboo on the floor and trying to shatter someone's ankle with the bamboo as they were clapped together, I was chosen to dance!
And so this guy brought me on stage and went through the motions with me, and soon we were jumping for our lives, trying to stay out of the deadly grips of the bamboo. At least, that's what I assumed was happening while I was dancing. I was totally in my own little world. In retrospect, I think it's probably a good thing that I didn't get the spiked buko juice. (Though maybe if it were spiked, it would have tasted better.)
Want to avoid $14/hr Internet charges? Do what I didn't and research Manila Hotels a little better. There's a ton to choose from, in every reach of the city and in every price range you can imagine.
Technorati: Manila, Philippines, hotel, travel, Internet, Corregidor, Corregidor Island
Comments
Yay, I'm glad we finally were able to have an update from your trip to the Phillipines. What an adventure the two of you had!!! :) I can't wait to hear and see more about it - we need to get together and discuss!
Posted by: Mel | February 27, 2006 05:38 PM
I can only imagine how much fun you are to travel with! Keep sharing stories and I'll keep enjoying vicariously!!
Posted by: amelia | February 27, 2006 07:09 PM
Spiked buko juice? What's a buko?
Posted by: Ben | February 27, 2006 07:52 PM
-5 points for such a long post
-5 points for male nudity
-5 points for taking so long to post this
When I take the time to read through it I might give you some points back, but for now my dear Jes, you are in the negatives!!!
Posted by: the blog patrol | February 28, 2006 08:40 AM
Buko juice is a young coconut. They drill through it and insert a straw, or in my case, cut it in half and insert the straw. And you drink the juice.
Except it doesn't taste coconut-y. It's more like watered-down boric acid.
Posted by: jes | February 28, 2006 08:44 AM
Whatever! When I read your comment, EDDO, I thought that the - was a bullet point, and I couldn't figure out why I was getting 5 points for taking so long to post it.
Also, at least it's not a full-frontal, which is VERY COMMON among little ones in the Philippines.
Posted by: jes | February 28, 2006 08:50 AM
So...did any cute 3 year olds make it into your carry-on? I KNOW at least 2 followed you home...
I will have to second the blog patrol. -5 for male nudy.
Finally, I love your story-telling style. Just the right amount of insanity in there.
Posted by: eric | February 28, 2006 08:51 AM
Imelda Marcos? Did you ask to see her shoe collecetion? Some say it numbered 3,000, that's THREE THOUSAND SHOES (actually 6,000 shoes total but 3,000 pairs) and she wears the same size as me. THAT would have been a good prize (instead of a dead frog with a zipper butt), a pair of IM's shoes.
Ok now I must return to this long post to continue reading.
Posted by: Katie | February 28, 2006 08:58 AM
Comfort Rooms? Ahahahahaha, totally going to call them that from now on.
Posted by: Katie | February 28, 2006 08:59 AM
and now as I look at the pictures, I'm reminded of Haiti, with the shacks, the peddlers on the side of the road (except in Haiti they sold Tommy Hilfiger knock offs), and then the busses (so fun, the partridge family has nothing on jesus in sun glasses).
Jessica, it was like I was there with you, although I wasn't, but with this re-enactment of your trip I could have been (maybe I installed a secret camera in Country Bear and he documented the trip for me - hmmmm you'll never know).
Posted by: Katie | February 28, 2006 09:13 AM
Finally a post about the trip. Thank you for at least not showing the "peeing"... I though that was coming next and I was scared.
Posted by: steve | February 28, 2006 12:43 PM
Wow, what an experience. I can't wait to do it one day. I think everyone should.
Posted by: Suzy | February 28, 2006 06:54 PM
Can I please come over and practice those dances with you? You know how much I LOVE choreographed dance routines.
Oh and the part about shimmying like Elvis on the jeepney but not gyrating your hips?!! Can you hear me SNORTING WITH LAUGHTER from here?!
Posted by: Nothing But Bonfires | February 28, 2006 09:15 PM
I finally read through this entire post - loved it.
But I don't change any of my earlier point subtractions and additions.
I will add an extra 5 points for story style and overall flow.
Also, I think it was YOU that was handing out 20 points on my site, but if you did, you left the wrong website address.
Posted by: the blog patrol | February 28, 2006 09:52 PM
This post was well worth the wait. The commentary and the pictures were "classic Jes". I think we all have a really good idea of what your trip was like and what the scenery is in the Phillipines.
So sweet of Roger to indulge in your request for the photo. And way to go on the bargain shopping with the locals!
One season of the Amazing Race they went to the Phillipines and rode in Jeepneys. I remembered it when I saw your photo.
Any more pics? :)
Posted by: AmStaff Mom | March 1, 2006 07:21 AM