Chirky

Each year for the past three years, our friends Erica and Scuba have invited us over Halloween weekend for The Great Pumpkin Blow. Erica loves to have parties, and the only way she could get her husband to go along with the idea was the promise of destruction, explosions and blow torches.

The first year we went, we hung out, we carved pumpkins and then we blew them up. And by "we blew them up" I mean Scuba, while the rest of us stood at a safe distance to ensure that we wouldn't go home with pumpkin bits covering our clothes or lodged in our eyeballs. Somehow, Scuba managed to get some sort of gas into the pumpkin through a tube, or something like that, and then he and his father would light the wick with a blow torch. The result made all of us quite giddy, and we delightfully squealed when the pumpkin did in fact explode, forever sealing our intentions of blowing up pumpkins every year. At least, that's my version.

This year we gathered at Erica & Scuba's place, and ate pumpkin dip and sugar cookies iced to look like a witches hat and chocolate cake and caramel apples. It was a very healthy meal. It was only natural that we would want to destroy the pumpkins after we talked, and ate, and talked, and posed for about three million pictures. Here are a few from the pre-destruction period:

It only takes a spark, to get a fire going...

The Roman Candles! All of them! Exploding! Inside the pumpkin!

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Yesterday morning on my drive into work, I heard a song that I thought was absolutely beautiful. I turned my radio up really loud toward the end, in an attempt to hear the artist's name. I've convinced myself that if my radio is really loud, perhaps the name will resonate in my mind, and I won't be able to forget it.

The DJ said, "Billy Ray Cyrus."

I thought, "Wait. What? Did he just say Billy Ray Cyrus? There's no way. No way! This isn't a country station!"

As soon as I got to work, I went to Billy's website. Sure enough, it WAS his. And now, I must ask you: did you know that Billy is a Christian? Did you know, and not tell me? On BRC's website, the song is titled "I Know You Now" or, as iTunes has it listed, "I Need You Now."

I'd put the music file here, except I can't convert it from iTunes protected to mp3. Sad day.

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Lately, it seems, God has brought new people into my life. Not so much new, though, because they are people I knew in high school. I don't keep up with anyone from high school really, except those few that I've recently "met" again.

First, was Willow. Remember her?
Second, was Monica. Remember her?

Now, it is Misste. I think Misste and I became friends in high school when we were on the dance team together. I remember her in 7th grade, when we knew each other but weren't "friends." We were on a school fieldtrip to Kilgore, Texas, and it was to educate us about oil. Or something. I seem to remember her as a giggly, loud pre-teen, and she was wearing a shirt to match her best friend's. Of course, I am also giggly and loud, which is probably why we became friends a few years later. That, and we also lived near each other, in the country, where we ate crawdaddies out of our driveway. Maybe Misste didn't, but you know that I did.

When Misste got her first car, we were so.o.o.o.o excited. It was a Nova! A hoopty! (Please keep in mind this was the mid-90s.) But she was able to drive before any of the rest of us, so we thought it was sumo-cool.

Misste is now married, and lives in Tennessee. I lamented to her how I would love to live in the mountains, and this was her reply:

Living in the mountains is not all it's cracked up to be!! We have three new pets. Only they are not the kind of pets that you can play with. They are BEARS!! Big black bears!!! At first we thought there was only one, but Jamie [her husband] stepped outside one morning last week to see how cold it was and all three of them were sitting by our side porch!!! I couldn't believe it!!

They tried to play football, but bit just a little too hard on the ball. Then they tried to play T-Ball and broke the stand in half, so then they decided to eat potting soil. And then got on my car with their front paws!!!

Monday night I stepped out onto the porch to get a bucket, and when I dumped the water out of it, I dropped it. That scared the bear who was right beside the house (also right beside me) and it ran off. I scream and ran in the house crying!!! [I would have run in the house crying, too!] They are just a little too close for comfort now!!!

The latest episode happened last night. I was grilling steaks on the grill - it was still daylight so I felt pretty safe. But I kept hearing something up in the trees. I wasn't about to go look, so I tried to convince myself that it was just my imagination. I finished cooking and went and sat in the living room to wait for Jamie. About 6:45 I got up to go back into the kitchen and just happen to look out into my front yard. There it was: my imagination had come to life!!! One of the bears was standing in the middle of my driveway. Of course, I panicked and called Jamie to warn him so he didn't drive up and scare it. Then about 2:00 this morning Jamie heard something outside. He got up to go check it out and much to his surprise that dumb bear was on the porch disassembling my grill!!!! So now my grill in laying in pieces on our porch!!!

You can tell she meant business by the number of exclamation points she used. I think that I would have used more. That, or I would have typed in all caps WITH the exclamation points. And, as proof of these new "pets," she attached this picture, which was taken from her porch.

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I like to peruse the website for the Texas Comptroller of Public Accounts.

Go ahead, laugh. I'm a nerd, and I know it.

I started doing this about six years ago. I don't know what led me there, but once I started clicking, I couldn't stop. There's this section called "Unclaimed Property" and I'm addicted to it. I will search every person I know in Texas just to see if they are listed.

Once, I found out that Stephen F. Austin State University owed me $500 from a scholarship I didn't know I had received, and I overpaid my tuition. So I claimed it! Sweet!

Today, on a whim, I decided to search the site again. And guess what? I found out that a title company in Dallas owes my sister $1,000. Duede, seriously.

I think I should start charging a fee for this.

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Let it begin:

Roger and I recently went camping with our friends Gideon and Jeana. Before we left, we threw (literally) all of our camping gear in the back of their SUV and headed out for a weekend of roughin' it in Colorado Bend State Park.

You can tell we're roughing it because we're sitting at a picnic table, waiting for our water to boil so that we can consume the Maple & Brown Sugar Quaker Oats. You can also tell we're roughing it because I had forgotten to take off my makeup the day before, and mascara is smeared under my eyes. Jeana is sitting across from me, gallantly attempting to be studious and read her bible. Roger and Gideon are probably somewhere else, comparing gear.

See? How hard we were working and how difficult the trails were?

Between Roger and me, we took about fourteen pictures of this same waterfall. In fact, we were so enthralled with it that Roger recorded the sound of the waterfall, for your viewing and listening enjoyment:

Yes, we ARE aware that it sounds like static. What else did you expect it to sound like?

Proof that I married a hottie.

Upon a little exploring and a walk that was much further than we had expected, we discovered these springs. It was 90 degrees outside, which is hot for camping and especially hot for backpacking. The springs were welcomed, and we nearly lay prostrate in them.

It happened again.

Notice the terrain behind us. For those of you who have never been to Texas, this is a good lesson to learn: in Texas, it is FLAT. Please do not be under the illusion that you might see any mountains or hills when arriving by plane, train, or automobile. If you do, you are in the wrong state.

We backpacked to and made camp at this place called Windmill Farms. Or, Windmill Something Or Other. Can you guess why?

Also, the trees! So thorny!

While backpacking, we ran into a pack of wild dogs! Apparently, they overcame domesticated pets and devoured them. But not before stealing their collars and wiggling into them. Because everyone needs to accessorize. See the pearls in my ears? Perfect example.

The wild dogs pummeled me and knocked me to the ground. Considering I was top-heavy, this wasn't a difficult task. Roger couldn't resist taking a picture before helping me up.

Good thing it wasn't Halloween weekend. This full moon would have freaked me out. I was already wide awake, on the lookout for scorpions and snakes that were surely hiding in the bottom of my sleeping bag. And by the way, if Roger and I have little boys, and if we take them camping, and if their father buys them plastic snakes to play with, and if I find such plastic snakes in my sleeping bag, or for that matter, anywhere else in my vicinity, they should all be aware that I will die young, from a heart attack, caused by plastic snakes.

My husband, also known as Hercules, showing off his strength and wooing the women. The women, being me. Because sometimes I'm plural.

After a hard weekend of camping, we stopped at the Texas Stop Sign for lunch. And ice cream. We love having friends that like to go camping and backpacking as much as we do!!

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Saturday night, Roger and I met up with some friends for dinner and a movie. And when I say movie, please don't think we sat on the couch or on the ground, hunkered around a 32" screen.

Rather, we were on the third floor of a delightfully monstrous, technologically-advanced home that looks like it should be the set of Alias rather than our friend's house. The third floor, you see, is the theater room. The theater room is probably 20 x 20 feet, with an off-shooting hallway that leads to a restroom. In the hallway is a mini-bar and a refrigerator stocked with Snickers, Raisinettes, M&Ms, Milk Duds, popcorn, Cokes, etc.

The room has only eight seats, but OH, MY. THE SEATS. Each are chocolate-colored leather and recline to a full-horizontal position. They have cupholders, and are attached movie-theater style. Beneath the television screen is a small wooden stage, where the kids get up and do "performances," and in front of the television is a deep red theater curtain.

The television itself is a 72" HDTV projector screen, so crisp that I could see the hair follicles of every Auburn University football player. I would have been perfectly content to lay there and stare at the ceiling, but our friends were even more gracious by having several movies for us to choose from!!

We all decided on "The Punisher," a movie with Sylvester Stallone and John Travolta. Oh, how far Travolta has fallen. I think it is because he is a Scientologist. But, shhh!! Don't tell Tom Cruise or Katie Holmes. Travolta has reached Thetan Level 9, which is the same as complete brainwashing by Xenu the great alien from a far, far away planet. Xenu seeks you, too.

"The Punisher" is about an FBI agent who vows to avenge the death of his family, at any cost. It should be renamed "The Punishment," because that's how we felt while we were watching this movie. The acting? So-so. The plot? Decent. The script? HORRENDOUS. Horrendous!! And cheesy! We all knew it was cheesy because at each "intense" moment during the film, WE WERE LAUGHING. AT THE RIDICULOUSNESS OF IT, AND YOU KNOW IT MUST HAVE BEEN FUNNY AND RIDICULOUS BECAUSE I CANNOT STOP TYPING IN ALL CAPS.

You must go see it, now.

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January? Is that the last time we got together? Please don't say it is so! Still, we had another girl's night last night. The same group: Nicolle, Heather, Erica and Katie. And me, of course! We all worked together in the high school youth group in Denton. We've remained in touch, and cherish the times we spend time together.

Last night was no exception. Well, there was one exception. Heather never made it. So I guess it wasn't the same group, since we were sans one girl.

Erica & Nicolle & I waited for like a hundred minutes until Katie finally decided to come in. And that was only after I snuck out to her car and photographed her as though I was the paparazzi.

See? I TOTALLY have the skills. Just imagine if that were a picture of Linday Lohan in her car on the phone. I would make millions!

Katie had her own surprise for me, though! She just got a camera! A digital camera! And it's so cute and tiny! It's an elph, because, you know, THEY ARE SOOOO COOL. And now Katie's cool, too. I played with it, taking lots of pics of Katie and the others at the table, and decided that Katie made a good decision. I'm sure that relieved an enormous burden off of her shoulders, wondering what I would think of her camera.

I must tell you that I am excited that I will no longer be the only one with a camera surgically bonded to my hands.

Erica and Scuba (her husband) went to a conference this weekend about adopting children both internationally and nationally. She explained to us the difference the different types of adoption, about the process, and about the needs for adoption. Thus, the majority of the conversation last night was centered around babies and having children. Since Erica and I are roughly on the same time table, we thought it would be fun if we conceived at the same time. So we spent a few minutes planning that, too. :) How exciting would that be to both be in the same hospital room together? SO. MUCH. FUN!!!!

My, my Erica. What a big fork you have!

I didn't make the same mistake that I made last time we ate at Carrabba's. No charcoaled liver parmesan. No meaty dogfood balls. I got the margherita pizza, an Italian classic.

Yummmmm....

Last night we celebrated Nicolle & Katie's birthdays. Katie turned 28 a week-ish ago. Nicolle turned 25 on Wednesday. Nicolle and Katie were rescued from certain embarrassment by our server-in-training, Jason. I took a picture of him and our real server, Grace, but with Katie's camera. Maybe she'll put it up. Anyhow, neither Nicolle nor Katie had to endure the restaurant birthday song, but they each still received a birthday ice cream! With caramel! And candied nuts! And a candle!!

Nicolle blows out her candle.

Because I filled up on Carrabba's bread, AGAIN, I couldn't eat much of my dinner. So I had it packed to go!! Sweet! Lunch!

Carrabba's Italian Grill. Except, not much of their food is grilled. So really, this name doesn't make much sense.

We couldn't leave without a group picture, and convinced the hostess to stop holding the door open for people so she could snap some shots for us. We're so conniving!

Sans Heather. We TOTALLY posed for this picture.

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Bianca and I recently hung out together.

That statement alone should tell you one of two things: Either (1) we hung out, The End; or (2) hello, people! It was Bianca and me! What do you EXPECT happened???

After dining at the Olive Garden, we decided that we wanted cheesecake from the Cheesecake Factory. We were in Lewisville, with no CF in sight. Being the savvy gals we are, we decided to get a slice from Starbucks! Because Starbucks carries CF Cheesecake!!

We had decided to see a movie that evening, a movie that was starting in about ten minutes, leaving little time for the enjoyment of the cheesecake. We decided to get our dessert to go, cause that's just how we roll.

The movie theater frowns upon food and beverages from outside sources. That didn't stop one roommate of mine, long ago, from popping a bag of popcorn, stuffing it in her purse and grabbing two 12-oz cans of coke from the fridge before we went to the theater. The distinctive sound of us opening our cokes in the silent movie theater was enough to make me sink into my theater seat and vow to never again do such a thing. That vow did not stop me from taking my Chinese-food dinner into the theater, complete with chopsticks (SO hard to eat with chopsticks in the dark!), to watch Remember the Titans. That roommate, I might add, was NOT Bianca. I was ghetto long before Bianca. She just served to enhance the ghetto factor by adding her own flare.

We wrapped the cheesecake in a napkin and carefully placed it in Bianca's purse, then carpooled to the theater. But, wait! Oh no!! I forgot my hoodie in my car, and theaters are notoriously FREEZING. Especially since I was wearing a skirt and tanktop.

Bianca thought she could remedy our problem by opening her trunk and exposing all the clothes and junk she was carting around with her. Then she saw it. And I couldn't stop her. I couldn't beg her to not allow it to happen. If Roger had been present, it certainly would NOT have happened. He would have taken his own shirt off of his back before letting us do what we did.

It was floral. An old comforter, for those emergencies in Texas when you might need a blanket because it's so cold outside. It's October 19th and 90 degrees outside. And you know, we might need a blanket in case a freak blizzard whips through the state.

Bianca managed to convince me to carry it into the theater. Laughing, I rolled it up under my arm, much like a sleeping bag. It was about that bulky, too. Oddly enough, we received no strange looks from others. We settled into our seats and curled up in the comforter. It was so warm! I loved it! Except the carrying-it-in-and-spreading-it-out-and-folding-it-back-up-and-carrying-it-back-out.

He looks a bit like Jude Law here, don't you think? Except he's not cheating on his wife with the nanny.

Whoa...me thinks SOMEONE recently had a collagen injection!

Halfway through the movie, I heard Bianca whisper to me, "Do you want some cheesecake?" I looked at her, giggled, and nodded. She got it out and handed it to me, and I spent five unsuccessful minutes during the movie trying to peel the entire paper napkin off the side of the soggy cheesecake. She got out the plastic forks we had packed, and we nibbled at it. Nibbled, because of the tiny pieces of paper napkin stuck to the outside of it.

And in case you haven't seen The Island with Scarlett Johansson and Ewan McGregor, here's a sneak peek, delivered MST 3000-style:

Yes, my filming skills are ingenious, I know. It's because I'm very special. Very, very special.

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Steve inhaled his corndogs and posed for a picture, delighted to show off the belt buckle that Katie had given him upon his arrival in Texas.

It is a well-known fact that you have not truly experienced the great State Fair of Texas until you have posed in front of "Big Tex" and listened to him talk.

That, and you must also try at least one fried food from the state fair. Last year, I tried the fried Oreo. It was

Once I recovered from that experience, I decided it was no longer necessary for me to continue to "truly experience" the state fair. Steve, however, had other plans. Here, Steve enjoys His First Fried Experience: A Fried Snickers that will begin a very short life for him, one in which his arteries become clogged and he becomes eligible for a quadruple bypass at the tender age of 35. Please excuse the sideways-nature of this film. No, Katie wasn't recording it. Roger was. I believe we have all learned our lesson now.

After The Episode of the Fried Snickers, we all decided to allow Steve a break from the fried food. The best way to do this was riding carnival rides, of course! We all piled into one cage attached to the largest ferris wheel in the world, or at least that's what I like to call it.

Riding the ferris wheel, also known as the Only Ride In The Entire State Fair That Will Not Cause Oneself To Project Previously Eaten Food Onto Oneself, The People Surrounding Oneself, Or The People Standing Below Oneself When Oneself Is Hoisted Two Hundred Fifteen Feet In The Air:

Jes, Katie, Steve

JCol, Eddo, Roger

After riding the very mellow Ferris Wheel, Eddo found a ride called "Monkey Mayhem." He was ecstatic about his find, and declared that he must pay tribute to Ben & Sydney, who live in the faraway land of Minnesota. They are, by the way, two of only 47 people who live in the entire state. The rest have since come to Texas.

But it would not be complete without Eddo shaking his "Monkey Maker" (a term adopted on account of Ben, who not only lives in Minnesota, but who also sometimes has a difficulty reading certain words, such as "Money" and "Monkey," particularly when the word "Maker" shortly follows).

Three people decided they needed to remove all nutrients from their bodies, generally in the form of vomit, and decided to head toward the twirly-sometimes-upside-down-rip your body apart-and cause your intestines to protrude out of your mouth-carnival ride. Those three were Eddo, Katie and Steve. But Eddo is just too muscular for the ride, and didn't quite fit so well. Which left Katie and Steve. We were able to catch images of them riding, where Steve amazingly had the ability to throw a peace sign at us. I'm still not sure how he managed this, considering his body was being catapulted by the huge hunk of machinery at a speed no less than 80 mph.

The two bracketed people are Steve and Katie. For easy identification, I circled the peace sign he threw out. And, if you look really closely, you can even see that he is sticking his tongue out at us! At us!!! The nerve.

Steve is thoroughly enjoying the vomit-inducing ride. You can tell that Katie's body is being propelled through the air, and I have it on good authority that she was glad she had a couple bars crossing her chest to "hold her in." Because, you know, THAT'S COMFORTING. I also have it on good authority that during the ride, Steve was yelling out everything that he had eaten so far that day. Or, perhaps that weekend. If you want to know the details of what he ingested, without worrying about images of it in the stainless steel airplane toilet, you can read about it here.

Afterward, we visited our last stop of the day. Apparently, at the State Fair of Texas, it is not enough to eat a peanut butter and jelly sandwich. It's not even enough to eat a peanut butter and jelly and banana sandwich. No. You must DIP THE SANDWICH IN BATTER AND DEEP-FRY IT.

The sandwich, in all its greasy glory, except with a little powdered sugar, just to make it appear somewhat appealing.

Steve, eating the greasewich. He said it was really, really, really good. And after he got one, and proclaimed its glory, approximately 20 people got in line to taste the fried delicacy. Heart surgeons everywhere rejoiced.

Please note me, beside Steve. I smiled for the camera, but really I'm thinking, "Oh. My. Word. Just the sight of that makes me want to vomit." Please also notice my hand, carefully poised beneath my face, just in case my stomach agreed.

After Steve and Katie left for the airport, Roger treated JCol, Eddo and me to a foot massage.

Please note the look of pure joy on Eddo's face.

Elvis is in the house.

The State Fair would not be the same without the butter sculpture, which goes hand-in-hand with the mountains of fried food. This year, it was of Elvis. Jaws are dropping everywhere. I can hear them.

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It seems like several of my friends are pregnant, or have just given birth within the last year. Over the past three months, I have had five dreams that I am pregnant, always with a boy, and I am always 13 weeks along.

Always.

And it's not even possible to know the gender of the baby at 13 weeks, but somehow, in my dream, I know. And the doctors and nurses know.

Since I am acutely aware of pregnancy and babies everywhere, I have decided take it one step further and post pictures of babies today.

Could these guys BE any more cute and wrinkly?!?

For the panda lovers...

If I was a porcupine, I would never give birth...

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Roger and I met up with JCol, Steve, and Katie on Sunday afternoon for a Mavericks scrimmage. We typically wouldn't acquiesce to such behavior, but there was something that drew us to this game: the promise of "beefy" men dancing in half-shirts. And one of those "beefy" men was our very own Eddo.

As soon as they came running out of the corner entrance, I zoomed in and started snapping away. As if led by a divine hand, we were sitting on the side of the stadium that the ManiAACs were facing, so we didn't have to watch them from behind. And as if that weren't enough, Eddo was right on the end, the same end where we were sitting. I think God must have arranged that.

Eddo tore it up, and I got several shots of his beefy body dancing among the Mavericks Dancers. I think that must also be a plus for the ManiAAC dancers.

Eddo, totally breaking it down. This is also part of a modeling campaign for Axe. That morning, when he applied it to his hot zones, his new and improved male musk was released into the atmosphere, quickly reaching nearby blue-sequined females. It was exciting, exciting enough to rip his shirt into shreds and cause blue beads to adhere themselves to his clothing, just to be nearer to this new and improved male musk. Did you know that quasi-scientific research has proven that women like men who smell good? Who would have thought?!?

The man in the background TOTALLY thought I was trying to get close-up shots of him.

His face! His moves! His face and his moves!! Show 'em how it's done, Eddo!

Consequently, this is also how Eddo looks when doing the chicken dance. Fringed shirt and all. Is anyone else as amused by the blue beads as I am?

And after this, he totally dropped it like it's hot, dropped it like it's hot, dropped it like it's hot. Eddo's a nice dude, with some nice dreams. See these blue-bead ice cubes, see these Ice Creams? He's an eligible bachelor, and got a million dollar boat...he keeps it in his bathtub cause he likes to watch it float...
Ahhh..hahahahahhaahhhahahahaa...I totally made that last part up. I should send in my ideas to Snoop Dogg.

Um, yeah. This man is WAY too old to have blue hair. Eddo, can you pass along that message for me?

Might I say that JCol looks quite delirious in this picture?

No one knew that there was going to be a praise & worship service after the game. Here, people are lifting their hands to the Lord and asking him to rain down Mavericks shirts and shoes. Really, the players TOOK OFF THEIR SHOES and threw them into the crowd. One at a time. And I was all, "Hello! At least throw them TOGETHER. Who can use only one shoe?!? Sheesh."

After the performance, we found Eddo. He had signed autographs earlier in the weekend, but no one knew he was actually going to GIVE JCOL HIS NECKLACE. Maybe it's even engraved "Peace out, Buttercream."

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I just wrote the following sentence in a letter to an attorney:

We made the requested change to Section 4.h.i., but changed the suggested language to clarify that the Seller will provide all contracts that Seller has in its position.

Because, you know, we want the Seller to provide all contracts in its position. The position is very important, and our work cannot be completed without knowing that we have all of the contracts in their position.

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Saturday I spent the day at home preparing for that evening. I had to lie to Katie about it, because really I was working on a surprise for her. But I don't feel at all guilty for lying to her, because it was for the good of the country! And the surprise!

Saturday evening we all met up at JCol's house for a quiet, solemn night of gaming.

I love this look on Katie's face. Katie and Steve took part in a staring contest, I think, but only after Katie had made the berry cobbler. Yummm.

Steve broke away from the staring contest, or whatever it was, to pose for a photo. Really, this guy LOVES to be in front of the camera. I think that's a very good quality in a person. Unless, of course, if the camera goes OFF of me in favor of the other person. Then I'm not so enthralled with that quality in another person.

The boys, being boys. Manly men in the backyard by the grill, separated from the women folk who are in the kitchen. Notice how reflective Eddie's shoes are.

I start giggling everytime I see this picture. Heeheeeheeheheheee!! (JCol's husband is in the blue jeans.)

Eddie and Roger judge talent and form as Jeff flips and drops the burgers. He's got mad skills.

Who wouldn't love a face like this? We all fell in love with Abby, the Amstaff, all over again. I want to steal her, but shhhhh! Don't tell JCol!!

So, so very manly.

Abby. Please note the cross hanging around her neck. This dog is SO going to heaven.

Wuv, Twue Wuv.

Please note the shiny hair and how tightly Katie is clenching her Dublin Dr Pepper. I think she might be a bit codependent on it.

The ears, straight up. The hair, ridiculously shiny. The Dublin DP, nearly gone. Addict.

She looks all innocent and cute here, but believe me, she's TOTALLY a Dublin addict and has just joined Dublin Dr Pepper Drinkers Anonymous. DDPDA. It sounds like a mouthful, but I insisted that Katie work through these dependencies. She'll be well soon. Really.

Also, I think I must be a great photographer. I really, really, REALLY like this picture of KT. Despite the pure cane sugar pumping through her veins and clouding her vision in a sticky, sweet, fog of DP.

Eddo, getting some serious action. He even closed his eyes for it.

Katie! Her birthday is tomorrow! We celebrated on Saturday with a surprise cake party! Happy 28th, KT!

Because it is a masterpiece, and I must put it on permanent display on the world wide web. Stop! It's a copyrighted, patented, trademarked cake. By me! Just in case you wanted to know.

Katie, so heavenly. She must have just finished drinking her Dublin DP.

Earlier this afternoon, the Texas Longhorns beat the Oklahoma Sooners. I'm sure that's what Steve is referring to with this gesture.

Everytime I see this picture, I start laughing. And the song, "Fat man in a little suit..." from Tommy Boy pops in to my head. Not that Eddo is fat, because he's not. He just looks monstrous compared to Jeff in this picture.

Katie and Steve, deep in thought. Settlers of Catan is a very, very thought provoking game. And competitive. As I like to say, "The whole point of the game is to screw everyone else." And I mean that in the nicest way possible.

It must be Eddo's turn, since he is the only one looking so intently at the board. Please note Katie, watching Eddo like a hawk. She's totally thinking, "He BETTER NOT cut us off. I need to build a road!!"

Yummmm...Katie's berry cobbler finished baking. Served with vanilla ice cream. If only I hadn't been so full from dinner, I totally could have eaten more!

Steve. Showing off body art. He has about 90 billion other tattoos, too. Just ask him. NINETY BILLION.

After Jeff won Settler's, we camped out in the living room and played Catch Phrase. The girls always beat the boys. Probably because when one of them has the word "shark," and describes it as, "It's in the ocean and has a fin." Whereas the girls get the word "shoes," we say, "Blue Suede ___________" instead of "It's something that is generally in the vicinity of the lower half of your body."

Here they are, trying to explain things to each other. I'll cut them some slack though, and not tell you what was being said in this picture. What do YOU think it was?

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It happened. Steve flew all the way from Oregon to visit his Texas blogging buddies this weekend. We had a great time, our days and nights filled with nonstop activity. Except for Saturday naps on the couch. You can read about the weekend at Eddo's site, and JCol's, KT's and Steve's site!

Here, however, you'll just get pictures, and maybe a few captions. Which is probably what you like best anyhow, since you don't have to actually use your brain. Like when you pick up a magazine in the grocery store. You don't actually READ it. You just look at the pretty pictures. Just consider this the Jes-azine.

Day 1: Friday's Festivities

As soon as Steve stepped off the plane, he began his Texas Experience. KT picked him up, and promptly took him to eat Texas' state food: barbeque. Then she brought him to my house, where we laid around and did a lot of nothing until it was time to get ready for the evening.

After getting lost on our way to Fort Worth, we had dinner at Joe T. Garcia's. I'm not sure what was so funny about Steve eating a burrito, but we were all significantly entertained.

Eddo, and his date Cat, laughing at Steve.

Roger caught this shot of Steve. Steve looks just like his pictures (except this one is a REALLY bad example) and videos. Imagine that! He's one of those guys that seems to be magnetic - everyone likes him, and he easily makes others laugh. We had such a great time with him here! It was as if we'd known him forever. I kept asking him when he was moving to Texas, but he never answered. I'm sure he's turning in his resignation and packing his house right now.

(Saturday and Sunday to come later - if you know me, you know that I am attached to my camera. I have so many pics to sort!)

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The Bible commands me to respect my husband. Luckily for me, that's not hard work, because I do.

However, does the Bible command me to respect my boss? It tells me to obey him, and I do that. But must I respect him?

Because right now, I'm feeling a whole lot of disrespect. Really, I'm feeling bitter, resentful and miserable.

Loathe. I distinctly remember learning that word in 6th grade. And we would have to say the word, use it in a sentence, and repeat it again.

Much like this: Loathe. I loathe the position I am in right now. Loathe. Or, this: Loathe. I loathe my new "office." It sucks. Loathe.

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To improve my diet, I am not just consuming ungodly amounts of water. I am also trying to acclimate myself to diet and protein supplements. It has been suggested to me by a certain Someone that I should eat three meals, with a healthy snack between breakfast and lunch, and another between lunch and dinner. Someone emphasized the importance of the healthy snack. Left to myself, I would much rather eat fruit. Or animal crackers. Or Oreos.

Someone gave me a few samples of different "healthy" products to try. Typically, I am against the consumption of meal replacement bars and snacks. But only because they taste so gross. You may recall the SlimFast episode. The episode wherein I tasted the Rich Chewy Caramel snack bar and nearly vomited in a projectile fashion after I had chewed a few times and the taste seeped onto my tongue. It tasted like raw potatoes! For the record, I am one of the few that actually enjoys eating raw potatoes, but my mind had realized that I was not, in fact, eating raw potatoes. I was eating something that looked like a 100 Grand bar, and it wasn't meeting my brain's expectations.

Yesterday, my mid-morning snack consisted of a White Chocolate Chip "protein cookie." Yumm!! Cookies! And chocolate chips! How could ANYONE go wrong with that?!?

If these cookies were all I had to eat for the rest of my life, I would be a very, very, very thin person. Much like Nicole Richie. Or Lindsay Lohan. Or Laura Flynn Boyle.

After each miniscule bite of my "cookie," I had to gulp down lots and lots of water to rinse the taste out of my mouth. And then I took another bite of the cookie, and so on. It was a vicious cycle. By 11am I realized that it would not be possible for me to finish the cookie, lest I gag and discover that every organ in my body had exploded within the confines of my skin.

Typically, such a product would naturally become waste, and be disposed of within a day or two. This product, however, met its destiny early. Not the toilet. The trashcan.

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When I read this, my heart leapt into my throat and I felt like crying.

Jessica Simpson and Nick Lachey have split. Finito. No More. See US Magazine's spread for more details, including the bitter back-story and a list of reasons they are calling it quits.
I. HATE. THIS.

I have already deleted all of Jessica Simpson's songs from my iTunes, and sweetie pie, I want you to go turn the Jessica Simpons CDs into the used CD store. I'm TOTALLY in protest. How could they do this without consulting ME first?!?

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When Hurrican Rita recently struck the coasts of Texas and Louisiana, we were prepared. Especially those in College Station, Texas, home of the Aggies.

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